23 Matching Annotations
  1. Feb 2020
    1. the fear you actually feel

      The fear of being discovered.

    2. The moon shines everywhere

      The moon must be a very important symbol.

    3. a plan for escape.

      A plan for her to escape ?

    4. Congratulate yourself on

      who was talking to her, and how they commuicated?

    5. amera implanted in your left eye

      I wonder how many different things had they put inside her body? I think the process must be very unpleasant.

    6. They liken the need for personal glory to cigarette addiction: a habit that feels life-sustaining even as it kills you

      Here the author compared the situation of her action as cigarette addiction. We all know the fact that smoking is very bad for our health and can lead to death, however people still choose to smoke, due to the fact that it has a very good feeling. This is similar to the kind of patriotism in the story, which she knew that her mission could kill her or damaged her life permanently, but at the same time, she felt a sense of honor in this suicide mission. Here I think the author considered this kind of patriotism as a negative thing like cigarette addiction, which made a person willing to killing themself by creating the illusion of satisfaction or a sense of honor. She thought that she was living due to the fact that her life was valuable to make contributions to her country, this illusion of self-recognization led her to this mission. Since it was only an illusion, then this kind of patriotism might lead her towards death.

  2. Dec 2019
  3. tonnychenghan0104.wordpress.com tonnychenghan0104.wordpress.com
    1. The reader, on the other hand,

      Originally this is one single paragraph, but I separated them into two paragraphs because they are talking about different ideas. And I mixed them together in the free writing. I separated the part which talks about the benefits to the readers and to the writers. I learned from the class that the whole paragraph should only have one main idea and every sentence in the paragraph should all focus on that main idea.

    2. For example, When I was doing my Profile essay, I did not start with a thesis but rather a question about what the street artists truly are. As a result, I found a lot of things about street artists that I could never imagine.  So there if I went there with a thesis, then I will only focus on those parts of street artists that will support my theis, instead of discovered something new.

      I add my personal experience in order to give the reader an example of the benefits of using a question at the beginning of the essay. I learned from the class that personal experience is one of the most effective ways to help the reader have a better understanding of concepts or ideas. So I added this sentence to make more clear and appealing

    3. The story of the reading

      This is the reflection of the reading, “On Writing to a question”. I choose this article as my short piece because I think reading changes the way I think about writing. I realized that writing can be used as a tool for exploration. And begin writing with a question is really helpful to me on constructed my essay. It also made writing more interesting and engaging to me.

  4. tonnychenghan0104.wordpress.com tonnychenghan0104.wordpress.com
    1. To better examine this question, I think it is helpful to understand the process of meditation first. The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines meditation as “to engage in mental exercise (such as concentration on one’s breathing or repetition of a mantra) for the purpose of reaching a heightened level of spiritual awareness.” We can see that meditation is mental exercise. It is easy to think about physical exercises first, in order to understand the mental one better. When people are doing physical exercises like running, they are training their muscles to make them stronger. Mental exercises work the same way, but it strengthens a special part of our “muscles”, the brain. Even though our brain is not really a muscle, it can become stronger with meditation, just like the muscle. Alice G. Walton had a similar idea in her article “7 ways meditation can change your brains”, she said, “Meditation is, after all an active form of brain training.” Since meditation is all about brain exercises, then the benefits of meditation should be able to be observed and measured by brain activities. 

      I add the whole paragraph in between the introduction and the actual body paragraph. This paragraph explained the process of meditation before I started to explore its benefits. It helped the reader to understand my essay better.

    2. Another important benefit of meditation is that it reduces symptoms of depression, anxiety, and pain.

      I add this sentence for a better transition, so the whole passage went fluently from one benefit of meditation to another one.

    3. In Boston college, there is a labyrinth behind Baptist library. It is not simply a labyrinth, but an opportunity for meditation.

      Originaly, I wrote about my medataion on a place as the inroduction without introducing the labyrinth. I made in to this new introduction, becasue first, it can be a book end structure, and second it helps the read have a better understanding of why was I interesting in meditation. This new introfuction gives the reader who never read my "meditation on a place" essay a better context of the article.

    4. However, it is a tragedy that there are not many people on the campus who actually know about the labyrinth. This makes me very sad that such a useful place is being ignored. I hope by reading my essay, more and more people can realize the benefits of meditation, and use the labyrinth as a tool to help them live a better and happier life.   

      Originally, my focus is too general, so I change it. This new part I extended my idea and be critical on the topic.

    5. o I went back to the labyrinth and walked mindfully, focusing on the awareness of my surroundings. When I reached the center, I felt peaceful in my heart, and I started to hear the sound of the traffic on the road and noticed the leaves on the trees.

      I added this personal experience, first to achieve a bookend structure, I went back to the labyrinth and had new feelings about it. Second, I wished to use my personal experiences to convene the reader that meditation is beneficial.

    6. The process of mediation is like running, and long term of practice will make the hippocampal dimensions larger like the leg muscles.

      I added this analysis to further proofed the similarity of mental and physical exercises, which I mentioned before. And help the reader have a better understanding of the benefits of meditation

    7. Then researchers showed negative images and videos to these two groups of people to test their amygdala activities during this process.

      I wrote, "negative emotion processing" in the first draft, but it is hard for the reader to understand what it actually was because they did not read the original article, so I added this sentence to explain the process of negative emotion processing.

    8.  When people are practicing meditation, there is less activity that happens in the amygdala (mentioned in the last paragraph), which means less usage of this particular area.

      This sentence originally was in the middle of the paragraph, but I put it into the first sentence as a better transition and much more logical.

    9. ignore.  In order to prove t

      My first draft had these two paragraphs together, then I realized that the first paragraph was talking about why high external attention was a benefit, and the second paragraph was about the brain activities proofed the benefits existed. So they should be separated.

    10. Even though our brain is not really a muscle, it can become stronger with meditation, just like the muscle.

      I added this sentence in order to clarify my previous analogy of “brain as a muscle”.

  5. Oct 2019
    1. And I realized that the water was full of mud. “The germs in water like this kill more people than war does.”

      shooking facts

    2. A little shocked, Stevie expressed that the reasons for saving lives have always been obvious to her:

      sometimes, there is no big turning point behind peolple's motivation.

    3. BC is considering to build a salt reserve in the woods. It’s really going to damage their natural habitat.

      Why Bc tired to do this, they should know that this is bad for salamanders.

    4. “So…” As an imaginary salamander crawled across my mind, Stevie cautiously interrupted my thoughts, looking at me hopefully. “Of course.” I took the pen she offered and signed on the first line of the petition sheet. “Thanks,” she smiled, “every signature helps.”

      A good use of quotattion.