3 Matching Annotations
  1. May 2019
    1. But progressive-minded parents can sometimes be a problem for their kids as well. Several of the clinicians I spoke with, including Nate Sharon, Laura Edwards-Leeper, and Scott Leibowitz, recounted new patients’ arriving at their clinics, their parents having already developed detailed plans for them to transition. “I’ve actually had patients with parents pressuring me to recommend their kids start hormones,” Sharon said.In these cases, the child might be capably navigating a liminal period of gender exploration; it’s the parents who are having trouble not knowing whether their kid is a boy or a girl. As Sharon put it: “Everything’s going great, but Mom’s like, ‘My transgender kid is going to commit suicide as soon as he starts puberty, and we need to start the hormones now.’ And I’m like, ‘Actually, your kid’s just fine right now. And we want to leave it open to him, for him to decide that.’ Don’t put that in stone for this kid, you know?”

      This reminds me of David Reimer who was a part of the study that became known as the John/Joan case in the 60's and 70's.

      After a botched circumcision, David was resigned as a female and later reasserted himself as a male later in life. He eventually ended up committing suicide at 38. Much like David's parents, these parents are also imposing a gender identity onto their children.

      You tend to see this sort of thing happen with parents who subconsciously want a child of the opposing sex. Like if a parent wanted a boy they teach their girl how to box and play baseball. Because in their mind, boys like to fight and play sports.

      To enroll your children in activities not normally associated with a specific gender is fine and should be encouraged. Keep in mind that in doing so you are influencing their future taste, preferences, and behavior. That girl may one day grow up to be an aggressive/assertive person based on the nature of their upbringing. She is acting that way because of how she was raised, not because she was assigned the wrong gender at birth.

    2. For part of his childhood, that was fine with everyone around him. He was granted all the freedom he needed to express himself in a gender-nonconforming manner, from getting short haircuts to playing with stereotypically male toys like dinosaurs and Transformers. But the freedom didn’t last. When he was 7, his mom married a “super Christian guy” who tried to impose femininity on him.

      My main concern with this section is how Scott came to the conclusion that he was not a girl. Scott states in early childhood he was fine with the people around him, how they allowed him to freely express himself. It was not until Scott was seven that his perspective changed.

      Scott talks about cutting his hair short and playing with toys as some form of indication of his gender identity. Scotts stepfather imprinted the idea in Scotts brain (between the ages of 7-9) that he was not acting in accordance to his gender.

      Here lies the problem; the idea that a hair cut, what toys you play with, or what you choose to wear is any indication of what your sex is. None of these things are inherently masculine or feminine.

      Rather than fixate on how a person should behave based on their biological sex, we should instead encourage and nurture creativity & exploration. Teach our children to be comfortable in their own bodies rather than saying things like "you can't wear makeup; boys don't wear makeup." What is happening with a lot of these children is that they are using hormone therapy and gender confirmation surgeries as a means to course correct a problem buried in their subconscious due to trauma experienced at an early age.