I first came across this topic when talking to a friend visiting from another country. She wanted to know why in America we say hello to everyone and make small talk. My first impulse was to tell her it's just what you're supposed to do, and not to be rude. While the concept of different countries having different norms seems obvious in the moment, I was a little surprised she didn't do the same at home. Phatic communion was something so simple yet such a regular practice for me it feels like second nature. So, I find it very interesting to learn about what is considered phatic communion in other countries.

Growing up with a culturally diverse group of friends and diverse home was a gift. It allowed me to learn how to speak to those that weren't the same as me. It also taught me that there is usually some way to relate or connect to someone despite differences. I believe it's an exposure that has made it easier for me to build connections when I am in a new place. However, I have also seen firsthand how it's not always easy. Hiccups always happen but can be sorted if one person is willing to listen and the other is willing to explain. Unfortunately, I have even been around people where it seems impossible for them to even be interested in communicating with someone that doesn't familiar or comfortable to them.

This year for the first time ever I started working with a larger team of people where we all must have a good line of communication to get our job done well. This was my first time in a job seeing how the lack of interpersonal skills could have a huge impact, not just on the two people taking but the entire team. It quickly became clear that whenever there was friction some part of communication wasn't being fulfilled. Rather differing opinions, negative talk around the work, or poor conflict resolution. In one way or another failing to meet eye to eye or failing to treat everyone with equal respect can quickly become a team rather than a two-person problem.

I never thought of self reflection or "talking to myself" as being a kind of communication that has anything to do with others. But as the text mentions in the paragraph above the way others communicate with us can then shape how we move on to the interact with the next person, It makes me wonder how many social behaviors people participate in that are an echo of a past experience they had with someone else. It makes the act of deliberate self-reflection just that much more important.

I never stopped to think what the first words might have actually been or sounded like. It reminds me a lot of talking with babies or toddlers. How sometimes they assign sounds or gestures to the things they ask for the most. I have even seen kids use a word that sound similar then pair it with hand gestures until someone understands. While it may be confusing to a stranger being around a baby or kid long enough you can start to see the connections and communicate with them easier.