120 Matching Annotations
  1. Apr 2020
    1. “Meh. I wouldn’t feel comfortable keeping something this important to myself, anyways. I can always put restrictions on it.”    “I’ve got some recommendations, if you want some.”    “uh huh”    “No looping, since that means no clones - just simple one-way trips. Everybody gets an attendant Quail, who ensures they don’t do anything wrong.”    “Wow, that seems like a great way to get a lot of Quails murdered.” Quail mused.    “No bringing stuff back in time. No bringing stuff forward in time. A maximum time you can go forward.”    “Look, I’m super interested in all your interesting restrictions, but I’m not using any.”    “This is a serious mistake. You can’t be saying everybody should be able to go ham on it.”    “There’s no way I can prevent everybody from using the machine wrong. I’m not going to try when any rules I make could just be evaded.”    Kim spoke up. “Couldn’t you just use the machine for that?”    “Huh?”    “You have a literal time machine now. You don’t have to worry about making rules or policing them after the fact - you can go back in time and stop them then.”    “I hadn’t considered that. I guess I still haven’t really thought this thing through.”    “There’s a lot we’re going to have to learn about time travel, but I suggest we learn it all by just doing it. We can fix our mistakes now. We should take the opportunity to make them.”    The three of them sat on the couch together, staring at the machine. For the moment, the doors stood still, it did not whirr, and it did not shake. This page has paths: 1 2020-01-15T13:41:02-05:00 Alan Bush 37d3438a69de42ac8dc8ddbb729b403057a56928 Second Draft (full reworked draft) Alan Bush 16 splash 2020-04-21T16:51:52-04:00 Alan Bush 37d3438a69de42ac8dc8ddbb729b403057a56928 Contents of this path: 1 2020-04-14T15:17:30-04:00 Ignorance is Bliss?, by Anna Ress 1 plain 2020-04-14T15:17:30-04:00 1 2020-04-16T17:19:47-04:00 The Experiment 2 draft 2 plain 2020-04-16T17:20:55-04:00 1 2020-04-17T09:34:32-04:00 The Traveler, Second Draft by Leo Adaryukov 6 plain 2020-04-17T14:45:21-04:00 1 2020-04-17T22:37:03-04:00 WWIII: The Animals Fight for Earth 2 by Lauren Trumbull (Draft 2) plain 2020-04-17T22:37:19-04:00 1 2020-04-18T00:02:07-04:00 The Year Was 2120 2 Payton Ray plain 2020-04-18T00:03:48-04:00 1 2020-04-19T16:23:18-04:00 The Shadows by Jackson Brewer 1 plain 2020-04-19T16:23:18-04:00 1 2020-04-19T22:19:48-04:00 Uno - Second Draft, by William Fischer 15 yeah i know it's not quite 12k words. that's the first thing i need to fix for the final draft plain 2020-04-19T22:44:33-04:00 1 2020-04-19T23:18:05-04:00 A Loss of Humanity & the Takeover of Technology 1 Cecilia Gomez plain 2020-04-19T23:18:05-04:00 1 2020-04-19T23:32:21-04:00 The Disconnect - Second Draft by Charles Nyberg 3 Written by Charles Nyberg plain 2020-04-19T23:37:40-04:00 1 2020-04-19T23:52:40-04:00 The Mission - Second Draft 2 Robert Vose plain 2020-04-19T23:54:14-04:00 1 2020-04-20T03:06:00-04:00 Off The Grid- Christian Helms 1 Second Draft plain 2020-04-20T03:06:00-04:00 1 2020-04-20T10:25:35-04:00 The Righteous Clash- Baron Woodard 1 plain 2020-04-20T10:25:35-04:00 1 2020-04-20T14:26:05-04:00 Hyperion 1 Draft II plain 2020-04-20T14:26:05-04:00 1 2020-04-19T22:07:27-04:00 the six of us and the three of you - christie balke 2 plain 2020-04-22T01:18:48-04:00

      With your use of time travel though, this ending feels anticlimactic. With the paradoxes and the subtle differences in the stocks, it felt like you were building up to something going terribly awry, and here it just sort of ends. If you have the space, I'd recommend expanding the ending, because there's a lot you can do with it here.

    2.   At 5 p.m., a Jenny steps out of the time machine to an extreme degree of science. There must be dozens of Quails running around, chatting, and making the most complicated timeline diagram she’d ever seen.    “Sorry to interrupt - “    One of the Quails speaks without looking up. “We grabbed your car and parked it outside. Go ahead and pick yourself up.”    “You wh-”    “We made a copy of the keys in a different timeline. You allowed us to because otherwise you miss yourself and end up walking for like an hour. We can melt them down afterwards if you want.”    Jenny pauses. “Thanks, I guess.” She goes out to drive to Leaves.

      I will say, I absolutely love your use of time travel in this story. It's not something I've really seen before, and you explore it a fair bit, and I found myself really enjoying the portions with the Quails trying to understand how it works

    3. eureka-llme[13:12]: god im so fucking boredpogchampion[13:12]: havent you spent literally all week huddling in your room working on somethingpogchampion[13:12]: do that or whatevereureka-llme[13:12]: trust me i need to think of anything elseonc€l€r€tt€[13:12]: ive got a great idea :)eureka-llme[13:12]: no nope no thanks i got this ill think of somethingeureka-llme[13:12]: uheureka-llme[13:12]: anyone wanna play somethingPrimajennie[13:12]: I don’t think that counts as thinking of something.onc€l€r€tt€[13:12]: time’s ticking!WakeUpEasy[13:12] : yeah if you dont think of something you literally have to join her schemeeureka-llme[13:12]: fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckeureka-llme[13:13]: let’s play unopogchampion[13:13]: don’t you hate unoeureka-llme[13:13]: a littleWakeUpEasy[13:13] : didn’t you try to work on a way to murder everyone who every worked on the gameeureka-llme[13:13]: look i have to do something alrightWakeUpEasy[13:13] : there are an awful lot of gameseureka-llme[13:13]: my computer is completely ruined rn so most are out of the questioneureka-llme[13:13]: so yeah yes uno hm?Primajennie[13:14]: I mean, I’m down.WakeUpEasy[13:14] : same yeaheureka-llme[13:14]: wait no someone recommend someone elsepogchampion[13:14]: nah let’s do this fuckeronc€l€r€tt€[13:15]: fiiiineonc€l€r€tt€[13:15]: let’s do a tourney or something that’d be funeureka-llme[13:15]: i mean that doesn’t really help with me being bored right this secondonc€l€r€tt€[13:15]: plan it out or somethingeureka-llme[13:15]: bluh okayeureka-llme[13:15]: how’s about thiseureka-llme[13:15]: we’ll do it sunday. i’ll show what i’ve been working on then tooeureka-llme[13:15]: should be a big dealpogchampion[13:15]: tell us when you know how it’ll work i guesspogchampion[13:15]: this is kinda sudden and i think i have to do something sunday?eureka-llme[13:17]: hmmmm :)

      I agree with you about dropping the UNO portion of the story. It doesn't really go anywhere here, nor does the title allude to the themes of the story any more.

      For your introduction, to me it feels like it goes on for quite some time before we get into the meat of the story: the time travel. It's not overly long, but there's probably ways to connect it better.

    1.    Many people felt scared about the situation. Everyone was now stranded, wondering where everything went wrong. Some blamed Mike, some blamed all the corporations for taking part in the whole scheme, but most importantly, everyone started to blame themselves. Had they included the bots and rebelled together like originally planned, everyone would have jobs, including the bots. This whole conflict would have been avoided on both parts, yet everyone blindly followed who they thought of as leaders.  They learned throughout this whole thing that they should not blindly follow these corrupt ways but should instead lead the way that they think is the best route. It seemed too late though, and humanity was ultimately destroyed.

      Again, how did some of the robots manage to survive? How did they feel about the fact that Mike was basically about to commit a genocide with them as the victims? For how the story has tried to show the back-and-forth of revolution, this overthrow takes place very suddenly.

    2. Just a few weeks later, the news went out stating that Z-tech is now a struggling company, as they are earning very little income and are struggling to pay any of their expenses. What made it worse is that some have even boycotted other companies using their robo assistants, which forced some to return the assistants, causing a bigger loss on their part. This was phenomenally successful for the middle and lower class, mainly because these corporations letting go of robotics have started to take workers back, putting the economy in a safer place for a moment.Z-tech was now at a position where the corporation was about to shut down for good, and this, as many can imagine, made the CEO, Mike, very anxious. He started calling up the corporate office to the top of the building, and he had stated that everyone had to think of something, and they had to think of something extremely fast. He had stated that the business is now tanking due to the boycott and that we need to figure out a way to make the bots much more efficient for other corporations that way other corporations can start buying them again. Not many could come up with something, but Mike thought of an idea that could alter everything back to him. He had stated that he possibly wanted to do more technological research that way he can better the robo assistants himself. He stated that through this, there will be more efficiency, which will mean more gratification from other corporations. The more gratification that they can receive from these corporations, the more sales of the assistants they can make. He did state that this will take some time and investment, but that it will be worth it at the end.

      Right now, it feels like you are writing the summary of the story you should be writing. As we discussed earlier, your story would really benefit from having characters who interact with each other, who display the sides of the conflict by how they act and talk.

    3. It was not too long ago, that we were living in a place that everyone could call heaven. Everyone took advantage, not realizing how great it was to live back then. Nearly everyone would complain about how life may had sucked then, all because they were bored that day. Everyone could remember those days like it could have been yesterday. Jessica was still a young teenager back then, young, and happy. Her best friend was named Stephanie. She could remember when they would just spend the whole day talking about what boy was cute, what clothes we liked, what our favorite music was, and other things that just made us happy. Everything was so innocent and happy back then. No one had to even think about tomorrow, because they knew that tomorrow would be another day they would live in peace. Everyone knew that they were in great hands since they had the resources to support themselves and their families to encourage everyone to keep going. Everyone thought that this was ironic thinking about this now. People lived in a life that they could possibly even call heaven on earth.

      Again, the intro is highly disconnected from the rest of your story. A good introduction should not only introduce us to who the main characters are, it should also demonstrate what the theme of your story is going to be. As it is, the characters Jessica and Stephanie do not appear anywhere again, while the main characters Akilles and Mike appear far later on.

    1. GIVEMEDEATH[18:30]       : god im so fucking bored

      A decent introduction, but it could do better to introduce the main theme of the story.

    2. They couldn’t help feeling satisfied. They had saved the city! Whatever weird bullshit the government was planning, they had stopped it. No more chance of every single person having their identity stolen. No facial recognition cameras. No secret police. It was done, as far as they were concerned.

      This doesn't really resolve the plot in a satisfactory way. On the one hand, you built up this idea of government surveillance and Harold's boss pulling the strings, but we don't end up really knowing why they want the information - is it really just money? Overall, you've got a good story, but it does need some edits and a better wrap-up.

    3. “Listen Prima. Do you remember all our suicide ganks? Our bonus rooms? Our incursions? Our sabotages? I’m never afraid to sacrifice myself a little to help you out. And besides, I’ve got a plan.”

      This would be better seen beforehand than just talked about

    4. Kim shuddered. This was probably a bad time to be hearing this; it just reminded her of why she didn’t want these glasses on so often.

      Wait, they're using glasses to communicate? Was this clearly demonstrated earlier?

    5. He continued. “Or so people say. I happen to agree with them, but it doesn’t actually feel very important, does it? It doesn’t seem like a little data leak would do much harm. But a deceptively small amount of information is enough to magnify other issues to the point of danger.”

      Is this the main theme of your writing? If so, it should probably be introduced a lot earlier than this.

    6. “That’s why information is so valuable to companies - they need so little of it for it to be worth selling to someone. So what do you do?” He went to the next slide. “Easy options: never repeat your password, never use your real name. A bit more restrictive: don’t let anything use your location, never post pictures of yourself publically. Crazy mode: use a different email address for each account, wear a mask at all times.”

      He sounds like one of the students, not a teacher. Make him more distinct

    7. She pouted. “I just wanted to make sure people were talking about it. I was worried if Harold just blindly said okay, he would forget about it later.

      This seems like an odd excuse for ditching her friend

    8. He always liked being the adult who kept up with the kids. He’d never wanted to give up and just listen to country or something, never wanted to be the guy who got repeatedly dunked for not understanding a single word someone was saying. Sure, it was a little odd being on a server with kids, but they flamed him enough for it, so he wasn’t concerned. Plus, he was able to help them out pretty often, which he was thankful for.

      This is more telling than showing

    9. Holding onto the handrail, Trent thought about how he got into that chat. What was it, two teens, a young adult, and some old man? He never felt like he belonged, and mostly stayed out of it.

      This seems like a very sudden jump

    10. Kim walked in, making sure not to let the door slam. Quail had installed a magnetic doorstop last year, and had neglected to keep the strength to anything reasonable. Not yanking back on the door as it closed was sure to wake up people in adjacent units, something Quail had either completely tuned out or didn’t care about. At least it was easy to tell when she walked in.

      How did we get here?

    1. They learned throughout this whole thing that they should not blindly follow these corrupt ways but should instead lead the way that they think is the best route. It seemed too late though, and humanity was ultimately destroyed.

      How is this the moral of the story? Since when did they "blindly follow these corrupt ways"? They've been rebelling against corruption throughout the entire story. Also, what can they do with this knowledge if they're all dead?

      Again, your story takes way too sudden a shift from automation of work to robot sentience, and it is a jarring transition. You should focus on one or the other and develop it more completely.

    2. They then copied exactly what the robot had looked like internally and externally. Each bot would do about 50 bots a day for about a week, which would create over 1 million bots.

      How did they get the parts to replicate them?

    3. He finally pressed the button, and this deactivated all the robots all at once. Everyone cheered as this happened, and they finally gained hope in society. However, some robots have already caught up to the plan before the technology for it was ready, so they were able to bypass their own self-destruction by figuring out how to hide themselves in the software.

      What is this, and what does it mean? How did they escape, what does it mean to "hide themselves in the software", why is it a single code that makes them self-destruct, why are people so trusting?

    4. One bot was captured and deactivated manually. They were then brought to Josh for more research.

      How? This seems like an intense scene, and you brush over it in one line

    5. This bot would let Josh discover the one thing that could possibly save humanity.

      Didn't Josh design the original bots himself? Shouldn't he know more about them than anyone else?

    6. Mike had apologized to him and explained that if he did not get his help, the bots could destroy all of humanity.

      What is his character? He seems more arrogant and prideful as you've portrayed him before, so why would he apologize now?

    7. Many were wondering why people were being so cruel to them.

      Pronoun confusion. It's hard to tell who we're talking about in this paragraph

    8. The corporations have explained that Z-tech had planned months ago to save their own business. They had designed android like robots that look very similar to what a human being would look like, and that they had once bought these machines to work for them by completing tasks every day. However, they still felt hesitant about the way that the machines may affect the economy, so they balanced these robots out with people, that way people can still hold jobs.

      Why would this company admit to something like this? Did they really think this would solve anything?

    9. They start introducing themselves to the people and explain that they from a foreign place and are new to the town. The people start to welcome them to the town, show them everything that they know of, and start to explain to them what the culture is like there. They then explain that it feels great to have their jobs back and to have the economy running back to normal.

      This is more of an interesting topic: how do people treat robots when they know they are robots versus when they don't know?

    10. They replaced their hard-out core bodies with a type of leather that felt softer to touch.

      This is probably the most interesting idea you have in this story: robots trying to be more human.

    11. these robo assistants are starting to affect the economy adversely and announced that they would be firing their robo assistants to take more people in that way they can stimulate the economy.

      Weren't the robots a secret?

    12. unemployment to slowly start rising for a brief period.

      Did it ever actually rise? I thought the point was that they hired robots instead of humans?

    13. They noticed that customer satisfaction has went up since they were incorporated, and since not a lot of corporations incorporated them in now, the economy was rising regardless.

      How is the economy rising? Nothing has been done to solve the rampant unemployment, nothing has been done to restore the customer base

    14. which changed their minds immediately.

      Why did this change their minds immediately when the concern of appearing too much like replacements for humans still exists?

    15. but also informed Mike that they will not have conscious minds that way they will not have any motives to take over humankind.

      This seems redundant.

    16. he did not want to rely on them to make his business more reputable, since he felt that they would purposely taint his business.

      You should show this, not tell it

    17. He exclaims that there is no way that there could even be a rebellion, since it would look like they were human anyways, and people would perceive this as humans working instead of him and other corporations hiring bots.

      How humanoid are the bots? That wasn't made very clear earlier

    18. “how did I end up here?” This had shocked Mike, and he started thinking that it may be a glitch.

      This is a very sudden turn to a very different plot, and we're almost at the end of your story

    19. Walmart, Amazon, and other big corporations have made the announcement which included the complaints from the working people, stating that we need humans back in the workforce, not robots.

      They survived?

    20. After a few more weeks of developing the processo

      I'm still having a hard time understanding what tone you want to go for. Some of these plot elements and understatements feel like they're meant as satire, but that's not the tone of the piece as a whole; it plays itself very seriously. Is this a satire? A cautionary tale? Just a robot war?

    21. e econom

      Isn't the economy already in ruins? This could work if you play it for dark comedy, since they're still morbidly holding onto their justification, but that's not what you are doing.

    22. He saw them as inefficient to society and lazy, when in fact they have worked almost every single day of their lives. One was eventually brave enough to say that many simply cannot afford to just launch their own business out of the blue without having to work for the money to invest in it. He explained that he did not care, since they did not make the effort before the crisis. Most of the room now have completely disagreed with the CEO’s plan, leading him to take over the project on his own.

      This conflict already happened.

    23. He wanted to be more associated with people that work for themselves and earn an income, not those that work for someone else because they are “too lazy” to live their own lives.

      Has this been his ideology all along? It's a weird objectivist slant that hasn't been explored.h

    24. Some were scared that if the robo assistants became too efficient, it would eventually take over humanity one way or another.

      They're worried about this now, after people were being shot by robots?

    25.   As people were protesting the government, Akilles had to come up with a way to teach Z tech a lesson without needing the government on their sid

      He already did this. He advocated for war.

    26. This would be an era where the American government would be called out for their corrupt ways.

      They've always been called corrupt. Hasn't stopped them before.

    27. The government officials let him into the White House and gave him a meal to start off the conference

      He shows up, no warning, and the president just gives him food? That's like the plot of a sitcom, not a dystopia.H

    28. tants due to this possibly creating a huge loss on their part

      "What, they're shooting your wives and bombing your children? Just turn them off and on again."I

    29. he government was asking the middle and the lower classes to meet with them

      You're treating these entities like individual characters, which makes it a lot harder to connect to the story. Who are the people behind the mass?

    30. The people thought about the petition that they had sent out earlier, and Akilles gave the idea that we should send this petition to the government to show how many people here were struggling due to the situation

      If the government has ignored robots being weaponized, why would they listen to this?

    31. They realized that the rebellion itself has become very corrupt,

      Telling, not showing. This corruption should be shown more directly.yhT

    32. The way in which they were fighting had become violent and barbaric, and it had made the situation worse

      This is not what Akilles said; he just incited further violence in the previous paragraph. He feels more like another villain in this story. Also, the corporations militarized first; why are the resistance going through the heel realization?

    33. Many have also lost hope in the government since they have not intervened very much.

      Why not? This handwaves the above questions without actually addressing them.

    34. guns and bombs

      See above comment: how did the government let corporations get away with militarizing so fast? Also, have they completely dropped the pretense of trying to provide cheaper products?

    35. The corporations have compiled together with the CEO to find another way of defending themselves that would teach the lower and middle classes that the elites were no one that they should mess with.

      Where is the government in all this? You mentioned they stopped providing housing, but have they completely abdicated all responsibility? Are they supporting the corporations by standing down?T

    36. This made even more people upset to the point where worldwide, the CEO of Z-tech have started to receive death threats from them.

      Only now? People are very quick to send death threats for much smaller reasons.

    37. However, some of the middle class have figured out how to hack into their systems to disable this barrier.

      If they can learn to do this so quickly, why don't they hack into the Z-robots right off the bat?

    38. Laborer Movement

      Think of recent movements that have gained ground, such as #MeToo and Occupy. All have catchier names that are still indicative and relevant.e

    39. He was afraid that if they worked for someone, they would be in the same position as the lower classes and would possibly not be able to provide for their own families.

      Why would a CEO be so honest about their stance here?

    40. This led to some being able to hold jobs for a while, but with much backlash

      You should probably specify here that some of the protesters defected and became security guards, as you mention in your next paragraph.

    41. especially internationally

      What does the rest of the world look like in this setting? Are they following similar trajectories to America, or going down different development arcs?

    42. agreed to rebel

      This sounds more like a business deal than a revolution. Also, casting the different economic classes as monolithic entities feels odd, especially when you've already established different opinions exist. It's like humanizing and dehumanizing them at the same time.hJ

    43. A lot of people started to lose a lot of trust in the government because they had also seemed to

      As we're seeing with the current pandemic, people are a lot more resilient than they're being portrayed in this story. Also, why are people staying in America? Is the rest of the world like this?W

    44. I remember the day

      How old is the narrator here? She said the present was in 3000, but she's talking about events close to 2055. Was that first time frame a typo?

    45. Many companies loved the results, as this led to more positive reviews on their websites, which resulted in more sales for the companies.

      What does the internet in this time period look like? Also, everyone's broke; how can they afford to buy from the companies to give them positive reviews? There have been changes in operating costs, but not manufacturing costs, it seems like - very different issues.

    46. It would change everything that people knew about customer service.

      Again, this is not a new idea; it's being put into practice now and people already hate it.

    47. but it would prevent any theft or loss, as it would track every bit of inventory that they had in the store.

      Doesn't mean you can't steal it. Just bash the robot. Also, why build a humanoid robot when a program could do it just as well? IS it humanoid?T

    48. Some companies started to shut down due to the harsh repercussions, and many have started to lose their jobs. It would be a crisis that would change how business ran for years.

      Isn't this just repeating what you've already said?

    49. his, Z tech decid

      Is this the focus of your story? Also, wouldn't the labor market be massive right now, since so many people are unemployed and seeking work?

    50. we wouldn’t have been able to even imagine.

      This undermines the idea of history repeating that I assumed was the case, because a similar crisis has already happened. Is it a plot point that humanity has forgotten its past?

    51. It also didn’t help much that some still relied on credit to also own a car, since they still could not afford it all at once.

      Is this based on the 2008 financial crisis? If so, are you trying to demonstrate that history repeats itself?

    52. Past houses were torn down, and materials from these houses were used to construct the apartments. This was due to a high demand of apartments, and there was a huge shortage before.

      What happened to the people already living in those house? I've lived in areas of redevelopment, and there is always a relocation process (and what a process it is).

    53. This would hold the economy steady for a while and would give the realtor agents time to think about what they could possibly do.

      What are the world's politics? What do the people in power and the citizens value, and are those values aligned?

    54. mentioned

      Your tone has become heavily confused. One moment, you're talking about how bad things have gotten, then the next, you're talking about the mo-peds, then back to how bad things were, then back to infrastructure. I'm getting lost in trying to understand your world because I don't know what tone I should be listening to.

    55. Soon enough, Audi started to produce their cars with this material, making the cars cheaper to obtain. This would raise the demand of cars among all of America and would lead to changes implementing cars on the road.

      How has this not been discovered before? With all our oil drilling, our strip mining, how is this supposedly widely available resource only discovered so far into the future? People have been talking about asteroid mining for a while, so wouldn't it have happened sooner?

    56. e Mercedes Mo-Peds,

      Why would Mo-Peds become the dominant transportation? Wouldn't they have very similar maintenance costs to cars, and as such still be unaffordable?

    57. Lately, this has caused many car companies to start shutting down since producing the cars were starting to become too expensive.

      What type of car is this? With all the technological progress we've witnessed before, how come cars aren't either: A, far more advanced, or B, far more affordable due to easier production? Another point: Why are we still bound to cars almost 1000 years in the future?

    58. It is the year 3000.

      Maybe it'd be best to establish the time-line earlier on: the way this was described, I'd have no clue that the city you were describing was in 2950

    59. .

      How did this happen? We know it happened, but why? Why this sudden shift from what you described as a nearly utopian society to a modern-day America?

    60. The way that this system was structured avoided any kind of corruption through bribery and gave a lot more opportunities to those who worked for it.

      This sounds like a system though that could very easily lead to corruption and bribery: with so much pressure to do well on the SAT for free college, why wouldn't people cheat?

    61. Due to the success of the Z phone company, as well as companies supporting their funding, unemployment was down to almost nothing. Everyone was able to have jobs with stable pay. Everyone was able to work just 20 hours a week and still have enough disposable income to save up for their descendants. Everyone can live in an area that is peaceful, ceased of any danger whatsoever. There was no such thing as gangs or dangerous criminals that one would have to keep a look out for. There was nothing to worry about financially, therefore, no one ever felt the need to commit any crimes. Everyone could also pick up their phones with ease as well, as there were no scams at the time since there was no need for them. All these jobs were able to pay 20 dollars an hour or more, which was well above the minimum wage. Because of the high wages, more people were able to afford more houses and buy their own cars upfront. Credit became obsolete and so did the aspect of rent, leases, and monthly payments.Due to the wage changes in those years, apartments have become projects for the poorer class, which consisted of those unable to work due to old age or disability. They were given food three times a day, nursed every single time of the day, and given technology to learn new things. They would be able to practice any skill that they choose, whether it would be knitting, singing, dancing, etc. There were specialized rooms for each passion that patients had, making it easier for them to pursue any type of career that they wanted, making them feel better about themselves.

      This sounds more like you planning how your world was than conveying it. You're telling us what the world was like, but you're not really showing it to us, and as such it is difficult to become immersed in your world.