Well, you see, I’m like the famous Mrs. Cassidy, who is reported to have said: ‘Now, Mary Grimes, if I don’t take it, make me take it, for I feel I want it.’”
The desire of a sick person is not a desire but kind of indulgence. Maybe it is the symptom of Impulse Control Disorder that he would feel guilt after that, which could do long term damage to his relationship with others. "Make me take is for I feel I want it" is like the process of dying, his personality's dying into nothingness.