In the article, The Power of Persuasion, it mentions that, "Several years ago, a university professor sent Christmas cards to a sample of strangers. The response was amazing – holiday cards came pouring back from people he never met. Most never inquired as to his identity. They received his holiday card, and they automatically sent cards in return." It shows how powerful the reciprocity rule is, even though these people did not know who sent them a Christmas card they still felt the need to send one back . Cialdini, Robert B. “The Power of Persuasion (SSIR).” Stanford Social Innovation Review: Informing and Inspiring Leaders of Social Change, 2003.

I've struggled with Social Anxiety since I was young, I would never feel comfortable around others and I always felt like people where staring at me, especially in school. As I got older, it's gotten a lot better, but I still have days where just thinking about going out in public makes my heart race.

A really good technique for dealing with social anxiety is focusing on the breath. In the Take a Deep Breath article, they mention that "Deep breathing increases the supply of oxygen to your brain and stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which promotes a state of calmness. Breathing techniques help you feel connected to your body—it brings your awareness away from the worries in your head and quiets your mind."

Marksberry, Kellie. “Take a Deep Breath.” The American Institute of Stress, 4 Jan. 2017.

I agree with this statement that relevance is important. If an issue is not relevant to you or does not affect you,you won't feel the need to engage in that issue. I think it's easy to see a person's values when you can see what's relevant to them and their opinions on an issue.

This makes me think of when I use to work at McDonalds. I worked there for three years and honestly it was really, really crappy place to work at, and there have been so many times I thought to myself “Once I leave this place I will be much happier”. Eventually I did leave for school, and I ended up feeling really sad about it because of how much I missed my coworkers and working with them. I thought on my last day I would be so ecstatic and happy to leave, but I ended up being down about it for the next few days which came as a surprise to me.

I have definitely been guilty of thinking that I have enough to complete a task, I always have either too much time left or too little time left.

This reminds me of meditation and how the whole idea behind it is to quiet the mind. I think that why meditation is so hard for most of us because quieting the mind is difficult especially in this day of age where we are brains are constantly stimulated.(phones, TV, music, etc.)

I agree with this, people are very critical of themselves and I think that is mainly because we hear the critiques of everyone around else and also we are part of a western society that puts so much value in looks.

Maybe the fact that the capacity of self-regulation fluctuates is a good thing because it brings balance too much of self-regulation can be harmful just as too little of self-regulation can be harmful as well.

I agree that unresolved issues can cause even more issues in a relationship. There have been times where when I was in a relationship with an ex, if one of us got into an argument we would bring up a past issue that we had not forgiven each other for and end up back at square one. I think forgiveness is important because I personally believe that it’s harder to heal and grow from something that still hurts you and I think if you want to be in a long relationship a lot of forgiveness is required.

Showing gratitude to a friend/partner is important because it shows that you value them and appreciate the things they’ve done for you. It’s easy to be taken for granted just as it is taking someone for granted. When someone knows that they are appreciated they feel confident with where they stand in your life and makes them feel like they have a purpose.

Having positive relationships is important because personally I believe that who you surround yourself with is who you become or they are a reflection of who you are. It’s hard to be happy or to grow as an individual when you are around people that are always holding you back. I think many of us tend to ignore a negative relationship we have with someone because they are either a friend or family member, and a lot of the time it is not until that person or relationship has ended that you then realize how much of a negative impact that relationship to you.

I agree that a lack of love can be detrimental when one is young because it can completely changes who they become when they get older. I believe that is why there are so many cruel people (abusers, murders, rapists, bullies, etc.) or people who are mentally distraught because there was a lack of love and understanding for them when they were a child.

It’s very common in today’s society to see everyone sitting in a room on their phones. Even if two people are having a conversation, if there’s an awkward silence automatically someone will grab out their phone. I think this generation and younger generations are finding it harder and harder to communicate with others face to face, and that could be a possible reason as to why so many young people suffer from loneliness and depression. Even though we can sit on our phones and text or message multiple people, there is still a lack of connection that you can get from talking to someone face to face.

I agree that love has such a powerful effect on humans and is a fundamental need. If we are neglected when we are younger and do not receive love, we begin to project our pain onto either ourselves or others. I believe if we had more love and understanding in the world, there would be less cruelty and hate. There are some people who have everything they need in life, but they don't have loving and fulfilling relationships so they feel empty and depressed despite their physical surroundings. Then there are people who have little to nothing, but they have a strong relationship with their family and community and even though they don't have much they feel content and satisfied.

I don't agree with arrange marriages because I believe love to be extremely sacred, and it isn't something you can necessarily force. I'm definitely big on allowing things to happen as they naturally should and going with the flow so the thought of being forced to marry someone you may not even click with sounds terrifying to me.

I believe love is different and the same. It's different in how you love something/someone, for example how you love your soulmate and how you love your favorite book is different. But all love is the same as it always brings about happiness and an overall good feeling.

Anxious-avoidant reminds me of one of my exes and how he was so against opening up and being vunerable. He always had a mask on so he could cover how much he really cared because he thought he would be seen as weak. I think he acted this way because growing up he did not have the best relationship with his mother. I think him trying to act like he didn’t care about anyone or anything really showed how much he was actually hurting and needed someone to care about him. This shows how love and support from a parent is so important and how it completely shapes who we are.

This makes me think of how some people are attracted to someone because that person reminds them of themselves. They have similar personalities traits and maybe similar facial features and that familiarity is attractive to them.

I agree that for many of us what we find attractive is based off what our culture finds attractive. In Western culture, especially in the social media world, we find certain looks such as hour-glass figures, big lips, long hair, etc. as attractive. For example, Kardashians are well known for their looks (body shape, lips, hair, etc.) and many people place them on a pedestal simply based off their looks, this shows what our western society values and see as beautiful.Whereas in other cultures, such as African culture, scarification, braids, and tribal paintings are seen as attractive and if you have a high status you most likely had one of those attractive characteristics.This example shows that culture plays a significant role in what one defines as attractive and beauty differs from culture to culture. What one culture or society consider to be attractive may completely differ from another culture.