The vignette "Dream House as Naming the Animals" highlights the feat of "putting language to something for which you have no language" or the notion of labeling in queer discourse. Our discussion of Munoz' piece on disidentification featured a discussion of interpollation or the duress behind labeling gender identity, sexual orientation, and gender performance. However, in this case, labeling upholds a different tone. I believe Machado feels sympathy for Adam because she is encountering the same issue of labeling her relationship as an abusive one. In a way, her inexperience in a queer relationship puts her on a vulnerable playing field as she is "newly created... and didn't have years of life experience to support this creative enterprise or anyone to teach him about it" (Machado 134). However, amid these terrible experiences, the act of labeling means that the "creative enterprise" of this relationship ends and the fantasy (U-Haul thing) dies. Yet, Adam did the deed and I hope she does too eventually :(

This reminds me of the vignette that talks about the movie Gaslight and accentuates how her standards of behavior, normal or outlier behaviors stem from movies, books, friends' experiences, but never from any personal experience. In this scene, she sleeps on the couch and justifies this action based on movies. This aspect of her creates a level of vulnerability while simultaneously shields her from sleeping next to her girlfriend after her actions.

possibly titled "dream house as second chances" because she thinks any adjustment to their relationship might change its present course?

This part struck me because she initially identifies with his story, and now she dies a psychological death and is yearning for immortality. This vignette encapsulates the purpose of her memoir: to create a story of domestic abuse in same sex couples that is often absent from archive and discourse. In this vignette, she posits another universal story that is silenced which is the scourge of AIDS on the queer community in history and present day. She identifies with Ross "who is also Untitled, who is also dead, who will also always be alive immortal" because the scourge of domestic abuse has silenced her and is the reason behind her psychological demise. Here, she is stuck in New York City, stuck in this relationship, and stuck in Ross' gaze: the gaze of death staring back at her. Though she is mentally stuck, she is physically free like Greta. To the narrator, death is the causal pathway toward freedom of the spirit or "resurrection" (Machado)

could possibly be a metaphor for herself, as she understood her and was "profoundly unnerved by her malaise." However, when she dogsits her, she is nerved by her malaise once she realizes that there are no external influences her inhibiting her from moving about freely.

almost half of the beginning of this section employs a second person, disassociated narrative style then transitions into dialogue- almost like diaz' style

the title as "dream house as lesson learned" right after "dream house as lesbian pulp novel" is disheartening because it reads as if her queerness makes her responsible for her parents' divorce and her aunt's behavior. Alternatively, in a retrospective manner, the vignette title "Dream house as a lesson learned" may refer to the vulnerability she experienced in her domestic abusive relationship and this being the moment where she reconciles that fact from this past experience.

foreshadowing of the power struggle in her relationship now?

repeated from "dream as not a metaphor"

doliveras1 Just now is she going to reveal the physical dream house that leads to her psychological dream house?

i believe she included this vignette "dream house as the heat death of the universe" and her fixation on temporalities to discuss the relationship between queerness and the experience of non-linear temporality. Scholars within marginalized communities have contended the parallel progression of temporality that white people experience against the cyclic nature of temporality that marginalized communities experience, because of the traumatic nature of colonial history. Though unfamiliar then, her incorporation of this section reinforces the purpose of her memoir for me: queer abusive relationships and archival silence.

carmen puts her on an extremely high pedestal and Val's compliments to her always read pretentious but come off as genuine in Carmen's mind

the title and content of the passage "dreamhouse as an exercise in point of view" can be deconstructed as point of view as a defense mechanism for houses of trauma. In the expression of this relationship, she adopts the second person perspective ( like Diaz does) to in a way disassociate from the narrative, though it is about another person. Her characterization of herself is invariably posited against the "You" object and makes it unclear if she is the "beautiful woman" the narrator married or someone else. maybe this is the point ?

reference to the vignette or trope of the previous chapter "the dreamhouse as a perpetual motion machine"

eerie

possibly referring to houses of trauma that almost every human has

allusion to the Bible and Jesus' resurrection that just passed, the most prominent story in archive arguably, what are the implications of this?

the notion of "impossible stories" as the main quandry of the archive of silence communities is particularly interesting here. Particularly, the causal pathways toward resolution Hartman proposes is adopting a subjunctive mood or "advancing a series of speculative arguments," "exploiting the capacities of the subjunctive (a grammatical mood ": that expresses doubts, wishes, and possibilities)," writing history "with and against the archive," "imagining what cannot be verified." is interesting because I wouldn't regard that as a resolution immediately. Immediately, what comes to mind when I read this is the subjunctivo or the subjunctive tense in spanish that is reserved for doubts, wishes, and possibilities and used for sentiments you cannot declare or cannot be verified. In my study of spanish, I always had trouble distinguishing between the subjunctive mood and the conditional mood but the main dichotomy is the element of a relative pronoun and triggers like "It is important that" to express doubts and wishes over things you would do in the future. The notion that the subjunctive is one way to tell "impossible stories" or what we know was extremely possible realities like "domestic abuse between partners who share the same gender identity" is eerie. As Machado notes, the notion of etymology and language is important and the tension between "impossible stories" and the subjunctive mood is palpable.

is this a clue to how she'll conduct her narrative?

another narrative that employs the second person perspective. i believe these quotes are not meant to just be ornate or glossed over. in this quote, she figuratively is constructing the narrative by giving us the terms with which to read it and understand it. primary themes we should look out for are memory, associations like bricks, repression, trauma etc, which are charged words in this quote.

foreshadowing the events of this chapter, the introduction parallels the other circumstances of infidelity in the other chapters. An interesting detail is Diaz' choice of diction in the various titles of this section to signify the difference between this infidelity and the others. Primarily, the title of the chapter "The Cheater's Guide to Love" and the subsection "Year 0" juxtaposes the various chapter titles of various women. Instead, the chapter title encapsulates the account of infidelity that evidently affects Yunior's sense of self and his perception of love. Secondly, he haphazardly throws the readers a curveball by mentioning," Well, actually she's your fiancee, but hey, in a bit it so wont matter" and undermines the commitment level of that relationship in hindsight. In this way, Diaz utilizes foreshadowing and irony by stating, "in a bit it so wont matter). In one way, Yunior inserts himself in the narrative by operating as a retroactive voice to inform the audience of the failed engagement between Yunior and "the ex". Secondly, Diaz employs irony by stating that "in a bit it so won't matter", yet throughout the course of the chapter Diaz wrestles with his infidelity and memories of his ex physically, mentally, and emotionally.

For Yunior and Diaz, biting through one's tongue during a sleep state serves as a grueling coping mechanism for two grueling experiences (Y- Rafa's death, Diaz- childhood rape). An analysis of the coping mechanism reveals two things: 1. the coping mechanism of biting through one's tongue and regurgitating blood may have a releasing feeling but it is a negative mechanism because it physically harms the perpetrator and victim of the action to exalt internal hurt. Secondly, Diaz' expression of the action habitually points back to one concept: death. In this chapter, the existential line between physical death and psychological death are inherently blurred, though this action happens solely in a sleeping state, his "tongue was always swollen, raw from being blown to atoms" in his sleep, the hemorrhaging of blood on his tongue each time he awoke, and his world and the world as he knew it would "blow itself to pieces" at any moment. In addition, a haunting detail that bolsters this notion of physical and psychological death is the line "someone really should have medicated you" (Diaz 151). Upon first reading, the past tense of the sentence is eerie because it reads as if Yunior has already reached his demise in some way. In Yunior and Diaz' case alike, the blurred line between physical and psychological death predicated an inability to commit to relationship as a result of the "bombs" in their lives. In the "Silence", the facade of the mask serves as a metaphor for Diaz and his work (i.e Yunior). The facade of the mask confirms a psychological death and a trauma that begets destructive behavior and if not ("medicated) then physical death.

I believe this is a form of juxtaposition and irony. Diaz posits the notion of decency and Americanness and imposes this notion on his family, yet he still has his "Chivas Regal bottle on his knee" and does not have to abide by anything. He stringently dictates the lives of his children and wife yet he is free to indulge, get home late, and live his life how he wants.

In his tour, his attention to material details (like the laundry room, the appliances, the furniture, etc ) evinces his initial attempts to restructure the dynamics of the household into that of a patriarchal structure. He is keen on how each appliance works, specifically he demonstrates "how to flush the toilets, run the sinks, and start the shower", against the mother's forced acquiescence, which maintains his control of the family. Despite his absence, his prerogative is to maintain the domestic hierarchy of patriarchy and enforce his rule onto his children and on his wife.

In retrospect, how does the positioning of "Invierno", specifically after the events taken place in "The Pura Principle" alter or enhance the story? Does the introduction of Yunior's father in "Invierno" influence how we read Yunior and Rafa's character dynamic?

In this instance, we (as readers) are moved from one scene in which his father takes him to a barber to shave his unruly hair, yet cut to the next scene in which his father is asking "Do you like negras?". His father's fear of failed assimilation (i.e his inability to tame his unruly hair) is compounded by this question, as he finally controlled Yunior's hair by shaving it, eradicating it, and he cuts to another avenue of control: women. Subsequent to this, he states the reason why he likes negras is because "they'll take care of you better than anyone" which demonstrates his machismo and subjugates the woman's worth to what she can do for him.

The common language between Rafa and Yunior is violence. Violence sets the score. Violence communicates what either cannot say. In their relationship, violence is vindicating and is the ultimate expression of masculinity and machismo. I am interested to know if Diaz will portray the source of this physical violence to demonstrate the cyclical nature of domestic abuse in families and how the abused become the abusers...

Unfortunately, this is another grim example of the machismo in this household, from birth to death. In this scene, Rafa steals once again from his mother and Yunior feigns disappointment. However, his facade is deconstructed when he states, "sounds great, Ma, but what the fuck am I going to watch my shows on?" This reaction is synonymous to his reaction in the beginning of the chapter where he states, " I didn't lift a fucking finger in our apartment, male privilege, baby.) I struggle with my empathy for Yunior because his point of concern for Rafa and his mother begins and ends where it interferes with his life. He feigns disappointment in Rafa's actions, yet displays the same level of ego and machismo that guides both of their actions and dispositions. Each member of this family is adept in defense mechanisms and facades; anything not to confront vulnerability.