I sometimes fancy that in my condition if I had less opposition and more society and stimulus—but John says the very worst thing I can do is to think about my condition, and I confess it always makes me feel bad. So I will let it alone and talk about the house.
his section counteracts the first part that I highlighted because she is internally talking to herself. She is trying to show us her own dilemma as well as who she is herself. She then proceeds to project her feelings into her surroundings, especially the wallpaper, which becomes the "image" of her condition.