17 Matching Annotations
  1. Dec 2017
    1. I was happy before I met him. But I’m alive now, and those are not the same thing.

      Before she met Olly she was content with life, she knew nothing else other than the walls of her house and she was fine with it.

    2. Two kids in the back of another car stick their tongues out at me and laugh. I don’t do anything because I’m not sure what the etiquette is for that.

      She has never traveled, she has never been out in the real world, she's not sure how to interact with others.

    3. Being in his car is like being in a very loud, very fast moving bubble. He refuses to open the windows. Instead, he presses a button on the dashboard that prevents air circulation. The sound of the tires on asphalt is like someone hissing low and constant into my ears. I fight the urge to cover them.

      Maddy has never been outside, much less in a car. Being in the car is all new and foreign to her.

    1. The second Maddy knows that this pale half-life is not really living

      Maddy is tired of being trapped in the house, she wants to be outside, she wants to live a normal life outside with Olly. She's fed up being looked after, she wants to be normal.

    1. If my life were a book and you read it backward, nothing would change. Today is the same as yesterday. Tomorrow will be the same as today. In the Book of Maddy, all the chapters are the same

      Maddy is used to a routine, her life has always been the same. She's always been home with the same routine.

    1. It matters that she feels the sun on her skin. She breathes unfiltered air. It matters that she lives in the same world that Olly does and I don’t. I never will.

      Maddy is jealous and also hurt, Olly met someone new but she knows its for the best. They couldn't have a real life together when she can't step outside of her house.

    2. But it’s not just about missing him. I’m also jealous of his life, of his world that expands beyond his front door

      Before meeting Olly, Maddy never really questioned her illness or hated being trapped inside as she did now. She just wanted to go outside and experience life like any other person with Olly by her side of course.

    1. “But she wasn’t just your friend. She was your nurse. She was supposed to keep you safe. She wasn’t supposed to endanger your life or introduce you to teenage boys who are going to break your heart. Friends don’t give you false hope.”

      Maddy's mom knows Carla was also a friend to Maddy but in this moment she is still upset she let Olly in their home and professionally she messed up.

    1. “She went outside. Because of him. Because of you.” She turns to face me. “She put her life at risk and she’s been lying to me for weeks.” She turns back to Carla. “You’re fired.”

      Carla has been with Maddy since she was little, she was Maddy's nurse and their close family friend as well but at this moment her mother didn't see it that way.

    1. A single black rubber band sits on my nightstand. She knows.

      The day that Olly was over, he slung a black rubber band at her and she never picked it up. Her mom knew something was up after Maddy ran out and then she found her clue.

    2. Was I really just Outside? What did the air smell like? Was there wind? Did my feet even touch the ground? I touch the skin on my arms, my face. Is it different? Am I? My entire life I’ve dreamed about being in the world. And now that I have, I don’t remember any of it. Just the sight of Olly doubled over in pain. Just his voice telling me to go back.

      Maddy's never been outside, it was a big moment for her but she doesn't remember anything nor did she notice anything besides running over to Olly's side to make sure he's okay.

    3. “Why would you risk your life for a total stranger?” I’m not a skillful enough liar to hide my feelings from her. Olly’s in my skin. She sees the truth. “He’s not a stranger, is he?”

      In this moment her mother realizes Olly's a little more than just a friend. Maddy tries to downplay it saying they're just friends online but her mom knows better.

    4. I don’t see what happens next because I pull away from my mom and I’m running. I don’t think; I just move. I fly out of the room and down the hall. I’m through the air lock and out the door in no time at all

      Maddy really liked Olly and that became clear to her mother when she ran out to see if he was okay endangering her own life.

    5. I don’t see what happens next because I pull away from my mom and I’m running. I don’t think; I just move. I fly out of the room and down the hall. I’m through the air lock and out the door in no time at all.

      The first time Madeline ever goes outside and it's for a boy she "doesn't know." That's when her mom realizes Maddy hasn't been honest about everything.

    1. Her eyes are on my face, but I keep staring at the scorecard. She’s been like this all night, watchful, as if I’m a puzzle to be worked out. Or maybe I’m being paranoid. Maybe it’s the guilt I feel for being so selfish, for wanting to be with Olly even now. Every moment I spend with him I learn something new. I become someone new.

      Olly's opening a new door for Madeline she'd never thought to open before. She'd never lied to her mother, her mother had taken care of her her whole life. Then she meets Olly and he makes her feel so special and she begins to crave his existence after the first time they meet.