11 Matching Annotations
  1. Apr 2020
  2. storymaps.arcgis.com storymaps.arcgis.com
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      There are a few different directions you could go with a conclusion, but some summary or wrap up or call to action will help tie things together.

    2. Dirk Hayhurst Former MiLB and MLB Player, Outspoken Critic of the MLB

      I'm wondering if there's a more effective way to incorporate the specific examples you're drawing on here. Right now this block/section seems out of place and a real departure from the level of detail/specificity you've included in previous sections.

      One option would be to expand the previous section to include specific player accounts from multiple people.

      Another option would be to incorporate these specific examples/player accounts throughout the previous sections, so as you're talking about player working conditions/compensation levels/etc. you're including specific examples in those sections.

    3. A player coming out of high school into a single A team will get less than a player that has graduated college and is going on to a double or triple A team. Other than this signing bonus, player accounts reveal they are paid “between $45 and $80 per game, depending on your level,” but that they were required to find their own housing and buy their own equipment. In fact, an organization called “More Than Baseball” aims to engage the MLB fan base into supporting Minor leaguers as they try to pay for housing, food, equipment, clubhouse dues, and more. The fact that this organization exists demonstrates a problem within the MLB, in the way they treat the majority of their workforce can be called negligent or indifferent at best. Relying on fan base support to care for the majority of workers in the labor force exposes the incompetence or indifference of MLB officials. I suppose the question must be asked if playing in the Minors is a real job, whether it holds the credibility to be a person’s one and only source of income. In my opinion, the answer to this question is yes. Players are required to put in more of their own personal time and energy into playing in the Minors than most minimum wage-paying jobs. Granted, an eight hour work day is not as quantifiable in the Minors as it is in an entry level job “regular” job, however, that fact doesn’t take away from any of the labor that these athletes must put into their game. The commitment that is asked of these players is enormous, and essentially, these young people willingly put their entire futures on the line to be considered for the bigs, accepting an indefinite amount of time with unsubstantial pay. 

      Transition into this paragraph could be more effective.

    4. The MLB corporation recruits players into the Minors, under the pretense that maybe one day they could make it to the Majors. The Minors would not be an effective staging platform for aspiring players if it didn’t have the labor force to fill the teams and create competition. In a more substantial way than the opportunity the MLB presents to an athlete, the athlete, in turn, works to allow the MLB to continue thriving with the most talented players the scouts can find. Logistically, it means playing for the MiLB team that recruited you, wherever they are located (regardless of it requires moving) and, as of now, donating your time into getting better and making yourself a more valuable asset to the MLB. Minor leaguers get a small signing bonus when they are recruited to a team, the value of this bonus depends on the team class and education level.

      Central or overarching claim you're making could be more clearly stated. There's a lot of information packed into this paragraph. If the main argument you're making here is that players don't have control over how their MiLB careers unfold, then there's more evidence you could bring in or examples that could come in to drive that home.

      If the main point is that MiLB players are an essential part of the overall professional baseball labor force, that's also something that could be explained more clearly.

    5. Minor League Baseball Teams Across the US and Canada

      Draw more attention to the work you've done building the map! I'm wondering if something larger/center align with a big header caption that gives users a guide to what they can do/explore/etc. with the map would highlight the fact this isn't just a static image.

    6. Dan Halem, the deputy commissioner of the MLB, responded to concerns about minor league player salaries and job security by saying: “If they’d like to be a careerist minor league player, they should play in independent leagues. The affiliated minor leagues are really to develop players for the major leagues.” This attitude simply demonstrates the Major League Baseball Organization’s refusal to take responsibility for their part in the minor league players that view their occupation as their career.

      More nuance you could be pulling out here, tied to the Dan Halem quote. He mentions independent leagues, but those aren't any more stable or profitable than MiLB in terms of giving players a secure career alternative.

    7. The future for this organization is uncertain, as the MLB is threatening to completely eliminate the MiLB and replace it with a totally new league. Assuming they don't dismantle the system that has developed into something much bigger than simply just a Major League recruitment program, it would only benefit the MLB to invest more in player resources, salary, and facility conditions.

      This is a strong claim--needs more evidence or explanation to support the argument you're making here.

    8. To undervalue the work and community impact of the Minor league teams would be a detrimental mistake for the MLB organization. However, even if the livelihoods of these teams were not at stake, doing nothing would also be a mistake, the MiLB should also change its structure to increase the quality of their yields (the players).

      If these are the two main threads of your argument or the key points you want to make, introduction can be structured to support/lay a foundation for both elements.

    9. Major league baseball. America’s favorite pastime, and a perfect representation of an individualized, self-motivated journey to make to the bigs. Countless movies have been produced off that single premise, a premise not characteristic to baseball alone, but the American ideal that hard-work can bring about anything one can dream of. One day we say, and to some extent, all of this is true. Obviously if you work hard in something, you will get better, however let’s consider this paradigm within the context of Minor League Baseball, the first step into “making it big” in baseball. The official site for the minor leagues posted an article entitled “Want to play in the Minors? Here’s how,” talking about the recruiting and scouting process that the organization follows. They reference a study conducted in 2013 that found that only two percent of college athletes make it to the professional league, and the odds drop significantly, to about a half a percent, for players that make it to the league from high school. These numbers speak for themselves, it is extremely difficult to make it to the Majors, which is fair, it is a competition for the most elite group of players in baseball. We also cannot pretend that those who do not make it to the majors are implicitly less talented or worked any less hard than those who did make it. In this situation, success is less about personal dedication to one’s goal and more about luck, as logistically only few can become a part of the major leagues. Therefore, it is unsurprising that the majority of the Major League Baseball workforce operates in the Minor League. In the Minors right now, there are 256 teams, with about 6,500 players. However in the MLB, in total, there are about 7,500 players, which means about 1,200 of those players are in the Majors. A critical issue to the well being of this group of over 5,000 people is that recent legislation ensures the MLB does not require them to pay minimum wage, acknowledge any overtime the players put in, or pay the players during Spring Training. Whether or not participation in the Minor leagues should be considered a real job and warrant fair pay, it is rather embarrassing that the Major League Baseball Organization is seemingly unable to provide fairly for its labor force- and exposes their rather dismissive attitude toward the majority of their employees. 

      A lot of great threads happening in this opening section, but organization and structure could more clearly introduce the reader to the context for what you're talking about and then the more specific argument you are making.

      Big themes here are the myth of a meritocracy, and the sheer number of Minor League players who aren't fairly represented or accounted for in the larger system.

      Slowing down and expanding this introduction to talk about each of those elements in more depth will strengthen this introduction.

      Think through what your audience needs to know to track with the more focused argument you're making about Minor League Baseball. How does this system work? How do people get to an MLB team? How many people are we talking about? Then you can transition to talk about the meritocracy myth. What is it? Where do we see it show up in mainstream discourse? Why does it persist? Why is it limiting/problematic? Then you can follow up with the call to action of what you will be presenting/sharing/arguing in this project.

      Pieces of that content are already here--structure could be clearer, and transitions will help flag and unpack key ideas for the reader.

    10. Major league baseball. America’s favorite pastime, and a perfect representation of an individualized, self-motivated journey to make to the bigs. Countless movies have been produced off that single premise, a premise not characteristic to baseball alone, but the American ideal that hard-work can bring about anything one can dream of. One day we say, and to some extent, all of this is true.

      More to unpack in this opening, in terms of laying a foundation for some of the meritocracy ideologies that shape mainstream thought about Minor League Baseball. This opening moves quickly through larger issues about Minor League structure and the related ideologies that would benefit from spending more time unpacking.