Problem Ownership Problem ownership is an important tool to utilize when caregivers are communicating with children because it can help avoid blaming and arguing. This is when caregivers take time to reflect on an issue and think, “Whose problem is this? Who is actually upset about this?” Sometimes we may think the child is the one with the problem when actually we are the ones getting upset. In reality, the child is just fine – we are the ones that have a problem. This is when a caregiver should own the problem. If a caregiver owns the problem, it is a perfect opportunity to utilize effective communication strategies such as I-Messages to express one’s thoughts and feelings regarding the problem. If, however, the child owns the problem, caregivers can use this as a chance to practice adult-child interaction techniques such as active listening and the CALM method to connect with the child concerning the problem. Problem ownership helps caregivers determine which problems they need to figure out themselves, and which problems they should allow their children to figure out. This provides a learning experience to gain responsibility for one’s actions that can be utilized in other relationships as well.

e manner in which parents communicate with their child can largely determine the child’s own communication methods and language development and can affect the child’s vocabulary and speaking skills over time. Using positive language can greatly support and encourage the child as they get older. How to use this method: Respond quickly and kindly to a child’s needs. Provide a listening ear or advice even at inconvenient times. Be responsive and consistent. Use positive and encouraging words when speaking with a child. Set a good example of how to talk to other people in public as well as at home by using manners and respect, such as saying “please,” “thank you,” and “I’m sorry.” Avoid sarcasm or ill-willed teasing. Use positive, communicative forms of guidance and avoid any form of violent discipline such as spanking. Spend time alone with each child, even at a young age. Quality time coupled with open communication encourages the child to feel safe and comfortable with their parents and creates a reliable relationship.