I relate to this so much. It's interesting how different and adaptable languages can be. I grew up using Spanglish in my household, with only one parent knowing Spanish and having to be mindful of translation. This experience definitely reflects when I communicate with native speakers. I'm accustomed to a slower pace and the expectation of picking up a few English words in between. I still find myself being much better at understanding and listening in Spanish than I am about articulating myself in it without the occasional English phrase, and I think this perfectly put into words how I feel about it.

I think this is something that has always made me feel very disadvantaged when learning languages solely through the education system. The standardized varieties of language limit the scopes of what languages are and can be. In my experience taking Spanish classes, I was often scolded and given lower grades when using slang words and phrases associated with Mexican and Chicano culture and not using vosotros, even though they were more relevant to my own use of the language and communication.