556 Matching Annotations
  1. Apr 2024
    1. bly surprising that there's some laughter at the arts and humanities expense… Some of my friends get asked why they're even at CWRU if they're not STEM. The fact of the matter is that non-STEM majors are drastically underrepresented within the student body." (“Taekman: Stop the non-STEM”, Taekman)

      this is a large passage. why quopte all of it? if decide to keep it, you MIUST explain it more thoroughly and refer to specific parts of the assignment.

    2. g, "

      commenting, "with the..."

    3. Taekman: Stop the non-STEM stigma

      put newspaper article titles in quotations. fix this and all other MLA style issues.

    4. ity

      because... or in what way?

    5. we

      state who this is.

    1. Just as Rich urges students to challenge traditional power structures within academia, so must humanities students confront the stereotypes and misconceptions hindering their pursuit

      OR her idea of claiming an education can apply to humanities majors who have to seek out opportunities and engagement in differing ways than their STEM counterparts.

    2. humanities students are often seen

      by whom? I would refer to this as perception.

    3. in society

      avoid using "society" as a way to discuss an idea or phenomenon. This is WAY TOO broad to ever be able to prove.

    4. This

      name it for clarity and transitions sake.

    5. underscores

      where? relevance?

    6. responsibility and involves questioning, challenging, and examining the information passed onto them.

      nice explanation and point.

    7. e. ".

      inclide citations

    8. within academia

      or external from it, too...

    9. emphasizes

      where does she do so? nice summary; just be prepared to refer to specific textual passages.

    1. orse suggests a deeper level of engagement and social responsibilit

      how does this relate to the purposes of a university? in morse's POV?

    2. uggesting that social unrest and activism

      where does he do this? more direct textual references needed.

    3. ns who actively participate in the betterment of society. Furthermore, the call for moving on "our own agenda" implies that Morse wants universities to be independent of external pressures, with external pressures referring to threats from alumni, government, et

      "so what?" relevance?

    4. es. Alu

      transition?

    5. critical literacy,

      refer to specific definition here.

    6. rs."

      citations needed

    7. these social issues

      which ones?

    8. e event regarding the anti-Vietnam wa

      where is this stated in the speech or its contexts? and relevance to your discussion?

    1. The responsibility

      can this relate to Rich?

    2. Historically, only certain jobs had permitted women to work in which, in the modern day, has left an imprint. Starting from a young age, gender roles are mirrored through the toys we give little girls, baby dolls, faux cooking sets and doll houses. Based on stereotypes, women's jobs tended to be centered around childcare, caregiving or organizational positions. These declared feminine career paths exclude many fields of science and math. The effects originating from cultural perception of gender roles is still evident from the moment you step foot into a computer science lecture

      keep this focused on CWRU and its community.

    1. Shor discusses two prominent figures in US education, Horace Mann and John Dewey, both sought to address societal inequalities through schooling. Mann advocated for public education as a means to combat class divisions, while Dewey critiqued the class-based curriculum divide, advocating for students to learn through experience and philosophy. In the contemporary context, critical literacy emerges as a pedagogical approach aimed at challenging inequality by questioning received knowledge and fostering activist citize

      cite Shor's examples. AND explain how these are relevant to your reading of this material?

    2. iscouraged and looked down upon. Shor recalls other elements of his younger life describing times when teachers and authority figures would criticize students for parental job status, accents, and other cultural practices with no way to voice any thoughts with the censorship of Shors student newspaper. Shor highlights the non-partisan reality of the educational system that leads to censoring of groups of students with underlying bias control what may be encouraged vs covered up. The 60 years has witnessed a conservative restoration against the democratic gains of the 1960s, marked by efforts to roll back egalitarian advancements through policies such as career education, standardized testing, and attacks on affirmative action, welfare, labor unions, abortion rights, school equity, and gay right

      how is all of this summary or synopsis of Shor relevant to your discussions? to you chosen critical concept?

    3. telling personal stories describing different realities for an individual impacted by their environment, race, class, and social and cultural implications. Shor discusses his position being part of a Jewish working-class family in the Bronx, surrounded by European immigrants and casual racism. Just across the Bronx River Parkway there was a black community that was riddled with gang violence. These two communities went to the same high school and Shor found that students community membership was often correlated to their membership into an advanced program available at the school.

      cite paraphrased material.

    4. Sh

      new paragraph?

    5. Critical literacy emphasizes the role of language in shaping individuals and society, and it encourages individuals to critically analyze texts, engage in dialogue, and take action to challenge inequality and advocate for change.

      nice. is this from Shor too? any of it?

    6. Ira Shor defines critical literacy as a form of literacy that involves "learning to read and write as part of the process of becoming conscious of one's experience as historically constructed within specific power relations" (Anderson and Irvine 282).

      excellent use of the reading to set this idea up early.

    1. ncoura

      where?

    2. students are not taught critical literacy to resolve these issues to prevent the cyclic instability the United States has f

      where does he say this?

    3. relates the poli

      where? textual support

    4. speech addresses college's role in shaping students outside of the classroom

      where? refer to specific textual examples. this needs to be more grounded in his speech.

    5. orri

      Morse

    6. t Morris

      Morse

    7. Louisianna

      mispelled.

    1. student-to-instructor relationship is often viewed through the lens of authority, where the instructor wields the sense of power over the spread of knowledge.

      where in Shor? Morse? your issue/group/event? this sounds like Freire but you do not discuss him. this page needs a lot of attention

    2. The power dynamics

      you do not have enough Shor on this page to support these readings of CWRU. This page should be about Shor, CL and a specific critical concept. These can be invoked and referred to in other conversations, but need to be very clearly stated and referred to here.

    3. Shor believes we have the power to redefine ourselves and society through our words and actions.

      where does he say this?

    4. e of critical literacy in challenging the power dynamics between the students and their teachers, and hopes for an approach to education that appeals to the student.

      citation. ALSO consider using Shor's own words to support this claim.

    5. Ira Shor

      start with Shor then bring in Morse. OR do Shor here and bring Morse in on the Morse page.

    1. Housing problems have existed since the 1970s and continue to linger into the 2020s, with more issues arising each year. Our campus has lost its' scope on the little problems, hopefully those don't lead to bigger one

      ? how does this relate to any of your previous ideas here? integrate this more directly.

    2. head on and describes the problems on campus and on other campuses without blurring details, while not blaming the students for their participation, but blaming the United States for their involvement. He also demonstrates the idea to prioritize inclusivity in order to challenge the past’s power structures and create something new and for the sake of the future students of American colleges and

      refer to the text to make these points.

    3. rust is the most valuable ass

      what does he say? refer to his actual words as you build on this point.

    4. es.

      citation

    5. ce."

      citation needed.

    6. ritical literacy

      what is this? define it before you build on it.

    7. higher

      ?

    8. pictured abov

      there is no media on the page. revise and include a line

    1. The office has als

      new idea, new paragraph. this is buried as you have it. these pages still need organization and focus

    2. Students have many necessary payments to make. Examples include financial aid, rent, groceries, books, tuition, etc. Some of the pay periods can also weirdly line up. For example, one pay period is a week after winter break. The paycheck would be sent out closer to four weeks into the semester. This makes it hard for students to

      put earlier as it starts to define the problem.

    3. lloc

      describe the problem before you get into solution territory. This is the page where you need to describe what is at play with your chosen issue/group/event.

    4. s.

      because...

    5. campus jobs availabl

      available campus jobs

    1. itical literacy

      what is this? you have yet to define or describe it.

    2. This

      what? name it.

    3. This idea shows another issue with banking teaching. Teaching students that the world does not change and that there are no flaws within the professor's thinking will rock the students' world when they explore adulthood post-college

      what do you mean? connect to Freire AND Morse.

    4. issue with America and the need to change

      again, show this before you make claims about it.

    5. According to Freire, “implicit in the banking concept is the assumption of a dichotomy between human beings and the world: a person is living merely in the world, not with the world or with others; the individual is a spectator, not re-creator” ( Freire, page 3). Paulo Freire describes the issue with ‘banking teaching’ when the professor knows everything and is teaching their knowledge. The issue is that the students feel they are less than the professor and are to follow society's rules.

      directly connect this to Morse. it is out of place here (and unasked for in this page so Freire needs even more contextualization).

    6. mor

      than who? expand this description of debate and academic freedoms.

    7. Morse believes college students have many more opportunities and ways to challenge everyone

      use his words to make this point. at the very least, include a citation of hwere you are paraphrasing this from.

    1. funded outlet for expression

      state earlier and work from here as you define your discourse community and its problems you will engage in.

    2. paper 1 page 1 m

      fix your media link

    3. Without club events, a college's community would appear bland and inaccurate.

      why? what do they bring that is so important? state this THEN how it is vital.

    1. Overall change and the lack of it can both be good and bad. This is due to a multitude of reasons from bad outside influences such as school rules, to personal experiences. And these changes can be minor things, to major things such as the teaching system which affects all of the younger generations which can cause devastating effects on the future

      cut and replace with specific ideas rooted in specifci textual ideas from Freire.

    2. ple of bad change

      but how is this change at all? confusing. revise.

    3. how

      where? how? relevance to your immediate point?

    4. The quote from Frei

      revise quote set ups to reflect quote content. try what we have been taught this term.

    5. change in the teaching styl

      these are not historical observations as much as they are proposals for change. revise framing.

    6. hod is the “banking” concept which requires the teacher to just deposit the information they know and have been told to the kids and have them remember it. On the other hand the newer concept or “problem-posing” education which has the students take the initiative and have them ask questions about the topic as the basis to teach a clas

      citations needed for paraphrased material.

    7. ow there is a difference in how the school system teaches the older system which is the standard in most places and the newer system which is better but harder to implement

      where does he say this? I think your rendering of Freire's contexts is wrong.

    8. book

      we didn't read the whole book. and at least refer to it by its name if you want ti invoke where the Baking Method section came from.

    9. etween good and bad change,

      this needs to be revised for precision and accuracy, the paradigm of good/bad here does little to develop or explain an claim.

    1. change can both be a good thing and a bad thing through the stagnation of the school system

      imprecise and irrelevant description. revise for precision and clarity.

    2. win

      where does it show this? why is this relevant? to what idea in this page?

    3. other quote from Robert Morse’s speech shows t

      replace with content to set up what you will discuss. we all know this si a quote from the speech. but we don't know what it is saying and what it is speaking to.

    4. n cause bad chang

      ?

    5. ba

      "different" and "bad" do not convey anything to your reader. different from what to what? bad in comparison to what? again, this is VERY VAGUE and such imprecision is problematic as you are trying to make a point about Morse and his perception of the role of universities.

    6. enge”.

      citation needed here and throughout.

    7. ve to be taken for example the Vietnam war and its effects/change in the culture in the US especially the school system

      what was teh change? and how do these connect? start with Morse (specific passages) then do this explaining. right now you are asking your reader to follow your line of thought with no textual places to grab on to.

    8. growing talle

      ?

    9. good thing

      vague. revise.

    10. Tempest and Trust

      incorrect name and formatting. fix.

    11. within you like growing taller to large changes such as moving

      odd collection of examples. revise for relevance?

    1. The maintenance and housekeeping staff are a pivotal role on this campus as they are essential staff who ensure the students are living in safe and clean residence halls. These staff members are overwhelmed with tasks due to the deteriorating conditions of these buildings. The first-year students at Case Western Reserve University are making one of the biggest and most important transitions of their life

      this problem and the players in it needs to be describedmore directly.

    2. h a new roommate. Yet, they have to live in these deteriorating and unclean dorms du

      how do these relate? explain more fully.

    3. This

      name it for transition purposes.

    4. iscourse community

      too large and unable to work with. facet down and make relevant and manageable.

    1. the world is [crying] out for a new stance” and Morse is demonstrating

      where does he demonstrate this? and what does he say? this passage should be in the beginning and the rest of the page should be referring to specific textual passages that support your assertion about his intentions.

    2. create an unbiased perspective

      where? again, specific textual support is needed

    3. utilizing language that questions the current social construct.

      such as?

    4. hout the speech, Mo

      where?

    5. egins to anima

      where?

    6. the challenges that the higher education system and American society currently experiences compared to the previous era of excellence.

      paraphrase pf specific passage? cite.

    7. loss of trust and credibility within the system emphasizes the necessity for a new vision of higher education within society

      where do you see this? you MUST refer to specific passages inMorse to support these reads of his speech.

    8. his type of media

      fix your media inclusion here.

    1. Ira Shor in his article where critical literacy is seen through the differences between looking intooneself and observing outwards.

      citation and textual reference needed for this to be a relevant reference.

    2. self-responsibility discussed by AdrienneRich, where individuals are advised to refuse letting outside opinions impact the way they think,speak and act. In this scenario, our country acts as the “individual” that cares too much aboutexternal events that overshadow internal difficulties.

      refer to specific Rich passage

    3. discrepancies between the university’s area of interest compared to that of the US governmentthrough an analysis of biases that lead to shifts of the power dynamics in critical literacy.

      citation for a paraphrase. this is not what he has fully done

    4. in response t

      sort of. this is not fully detailed but assumed that this is the environment he is speaking about.

    1. resources which would have been better allocated to maintaining the older dorms, which a majority of the students live in, are directed else whe

      how does this relate to the problem at hand? this problem has yet to be fully detailed (and needs to be)

    2. otes his dissati

      where? annotate or highlight the lengthy passage OR include a quote bubble or excerpt

    3. oom and board rates, there is great dissatisfaction in the current maintenance system

      how does cost relate to satisfaction here?

    1. He proposes a divergence in thetraditional power structure as a response to the societal climate. He says that student voices areessential in their education and betterment of society

      lead with this? and use textual evidence (spefici textual evidence) to show.

    2. This shows

      where? and avoid making claims about "society" as these cannot be wholly supported...ever.

    3. He promotes students tospeak out and analyze American culture.

      where? again, refer to specific textual places to support your read of his speech.

    4. m.”

      citation needed. here and throughout

    5. notes

      where? refer to SPECIFIC textual passage

    6. animate the critical literacy concep

      okay. but what is this concept of power and language in relation to CL? this should be established first? or could be linked to your CL page (eventually).

    7. Ro

      In

    1. s Kelvin Smith Library is dedicated to serving its students, in 2015, three teams of students made proposals to redesign the library as part of a competition (“A space for students”). The first-place winners surveyed 119 students and found that students wanted more access to whiteboards and ergonomic chairs (“A space for students”). Arnold Hirshon, university librarian stated, “It’s remarkable that from the first day of classes—before the first day of classes—this building is already highly, highly occupied every hour” (“A space for students”). Hirshon also recalled that five years ago [2010], KSL was underused (“A space for students”)

      there are a lot of external voices here but you are n ot mediating them very well. include yourself and explain how these relate to your larger scope.

    2. udents submitted a redesign proposal of KSL first floorScalar URLhttps://scalar.case.edu/chen-scalar-book/media/2015-ksl-redesign-plan (version 1)Source URLhttps://cwru-ksl-scalar.s3.amazonaws.com/chen-scalar-book/media/ksl2015redesignplan.jpeg (image/JPEG)dcterms:title2015 KSL Redesign Plandcterms:descriptionStudents submitted a redesign proposal of KSL first floorView asRDF-XML, RDF-JSON, or HTMLEach new class of students brings different needs and wants from Kelvin Smith Library. Compared to the past, the library is heavily utilized today. This combined with the trend of increasing class size may bring upon different needs than those of the past. As shown in the article, KSL is open to change and can adapt to meet the needs of its users.

      can you annotate this proposal and discuss the changes and how they relate to your scope?

    1. he problem-posing method of education strengthens critical literacy as students become the master of their own education and catalyze their own growt

      how does it strengthen CL?

    2. the true nature of society a

      how do educational practices connect to these societal practices and divisions? this needs to be considered and explained.

    3. Pablo

      Paolo

    4. one learns to recognize and resolve societal issues

      is this the only connection between education and CL? what would Freire say to this connection?

    1. Colleges are not isolated systems and have a role and responsibility to the American people.

      nicely said.

    2. , but ultimately actio

      make new sentence for clarity and impact.

    3. how society functions to al

      avoid moving abck out to intangible spaces like "society" (too large to make serious claims about). keep faceting down from Morse and college campuses. how are these spaces connected to these social spaces? and how do they differ from them?

    4. President Morse describes colleges as “radical enterprises” for the way that students “question, debate, change, criticize, and challenge” (3). Morse recognizes the importance of college campuses as areas for the development and discussion of new ideas.

      excellent

    5. he actions of college student

      which were? put this earlier in the paragraph and let the description of the contexts fill in after teh description of the speech and its intentions.

    6. political and social climate of the world.

      seemingly in response to the political and social climate...

    7. - Robert Warren Morse

      include the speech title. and center the quote

    1. sets an example of how critical literacy should work.

      explain further.

    2. change is taking place and progress is being made

      how are change and progress related in your paradigm?

    3. n".

      citation needed

    4. due to human nature

      how does this "human nature" relate to equality and active participation in one's community and culture?

    5. his

      what? name it for transition purposes.

    6. This change is oftentimes difficult to bring about due to one of its inherent qualities.

      use as topic sentence for the next paragraph.

    7. This change is ultimately what allows communities and peoples to progress in a positive wa

      because...

    8. practical effect

      what do you mean by this?

    9. critical literacy could be expressed through change

      more explanation about how these concepts animate and shape the larger idea of CL. AND why are you choosing change here?

    10. notice, question, and sometimes suspend the historically constructed conventions that are present in various discourse communitie

      who can (or will) you connect this to?

    1. this

      what? name it.

    2. basic literacy

      what is this? again, a formal definitionw ill allow you to focus in on what you deem is important from teh concept. ALSO what is your critical concept? That should be the basis for your page.

    3. anyone

      you are skipping over a major part of CL--awareness. many of the hierarchical power dynamics that CL can move one from are invisible and difficult to see. AGAIN, start with a set definition.

    4. questioning for the sake of making an active citizenr

      choose a specific passage. and cite it. what is an active citizenry? and how does this relate to literacy? to CL?

    5. In doing this students are able to build an environment of self questioning and when they eventually graduate and begin to enter larger groups and older cultural spaces they can change the functions, beliefs, and core values by examining them as individuals rather than as members inside a group unable to self examin

      this needs to be broken up and explained more specifically and directly.

    6. The use of writing to examine the standing of oneself results in an act of critical literacy

      what do you mean here? this line of thought suggests you do not fully understand the facets of CL.

    7. The point of critical literacy is essentially to enable people to see how they stand and to use their abilities of literacy to then be able to change or speak about their position

      says who? ground this in Shor.

    8. this student

      typo

    9. one's own standing within groups that are within a larger cultural context

      this should be a formal definition from Shor or one of the authors. You are missing an opportunity to start with firm definitions and details.

    10. this

      what? AGAIN REFER TO SPECIFIC PASSAGES.

    11. C

      where is your Robert Morse page?

  2. Nov 2019
  3. Mar 2019
    1. Vivamus tempus ipsum non sapien faucibus, dapibus fringilla augue pulvinar. Praesent fermentum ultrices justo, ut malesuada est

      What do you mean by this?

  4. Dec 2018
    1.   Modern problems require modern solutions, and nothing else reveals that fact than in the post-digital age, where many consider the old solutions wasteful and unnecessary. Post-1998 pretty much all media began adapting to the new information superhighway that is the world wide web, which is able to bring more content to more people at an even lower entry cost.

      again, great point.

    1. Unfortunately as technology is becoming a larger and larger portion of our lives, and as social media drains away at people’s attention spans, Case Western Reserve has attempted to fill the gap with their own digital media. What it has failed to realize is that in the digital age, things become far more dependent on the person going out and pursuing the content rather than just running into it on a day to day basis.

      excellent rationale

    1. This a sad life of an artist. Let us showcase our grace and talents so that everyone can appreciate our culture and traditions. It is all we ask.   

      relate back to your larger scope of USG

    2. Every time

      is this true? How are you funded, then?

    1. "Funding for any team at CWRU was in the hands of USG. And if they desired they could give life to any team at campus, even if that team did not deserve it. All that matters is how popular the members of the team are.

      great quote, but a lot to it. break this up and talk your reader through it.

    2. whose dedication can never be forgotten

      this sounds a little macabre...rewrite?

    1. some teams like Nritya

      what do you mean by this? small?

    2. 1993 students took over the USG. With many more rules and regulation the USG was running fairly smooth. In the year 2003 many new teams started to get registered by CWRU. Around 63 teams got registered that year alon

      great information

    1. homecoming game was only hosted in 1967. Other campuses like University of Chicago, Illinoi had their first game in the year 1908.

      Again too far back. Stay focused on USG or your club

    2. in-campus events t

      great angle

    1. We require a certain amount of funding for event participations within the campus, and for participating in competitions, including travel expenses. We need support, both in substance and kind, to further our interests, to encourage more students to practice this art form, and to bring glories to the university by winning awards in various national level competitions. 

      Yes. But how is this an institutional problem? State this as such.

    1. convert to a system in which the student has more power.

      lead this solution section with this idea.

    1. could set up a system in which parents and students are able to continuously upload case cash on to their case id

      isn't this the case now?

    1. This would essentially translate to student’s meal plan money would directly go to paying for the student’s food services

      I don't understand the difference.

    2. 1968

      why are these not chronological.

    1.  Also, there is a built in 45 dollar tax charge for any bar that produces less than 150 dollars in the first 2 hours.  Thus, Marriot Catering is making sure that they always break even on their services even if that means causing the university to lose money.

      these are pretty standard catering fees and expenses.

    1. “If you look at notes from food service comities for ten years, you will find that the people and food services change, but many of the complaints remain the same”(P. Kilpatrick). 

      repetitive of the caption

    1. Appetit has created a cushion for themselves in which pretty much anything related to food goes through them at some level.

      why is this a problem? Why is this monopoly an issue?

    2. unfair

      this needs to be explained and supported.

    1. he third solution listed

      have to name it because of the nature of your pages. There's no guarantee that your prior pages will be read first.

    1. This shows the difference between Case Western Reserve University and other schools with Greek Life.

      how? what is "this" here? And why is this difference significant? State it.

    1. He describes

      use direct quotes to show this. Also, break up this text with subheadings for each type. You also need citations for all of this information (here and on all other pages).