- Dec 2019
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cds.cern.ch cds.cern.ch
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Sec.??,
Fix reference.
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Pass one of two single leptonb-performance triggers that require:444–An online reconstructed medium muon withpT> 26 GeV445–Or an online reconstructed electron with withpT> 26 GeV446•Contain an offline medium muon withpT> 30 GeV and no jet within∆R of 0.4.447•Contain an offline medium electron withpT> 30 GeV448•Contain at least two offline b-tagged jets defined as:449–Offline R=0.4 anti-kT jets.450–pT> 35 GeV and |η|< 2.5.451–Offline b-tagged at the 85% operating point.452–The offline jet must be matched to an online jet.
In the bullet list, use semi-colons for the end of list items. Use periods only when completing a thought or sequence.
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Events are required are pass to the following selection
"Events must pass the following selection:"
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The set of triggers with an electron or muon in it441withb-taggingalgorithm run on all online jets is called ‘b-performance trigger’ specifically used to study442b-jet trigger performance.
This sentence is awkward. I recommend: "The set of trigger including an electron or muon along with the b-tagging algorithm is referred to as the 'b-performance trigger'. It is dedicated to the study of flavour-tagging performance in the HLT."
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electron plus a neutrino,
"... electron and neutrino..." (and similarly in a few words, "... muon and neutrino ..."
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is 100%,
It is definitely NOT 100%. However, it is safe to say "... is very close to 100% ..." or " .... is nearly 100% ..."
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an internal documentation of flavour tagging note, [25],
"... in an internal flavour tagging note (Ref.~\cite{})..."
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e,
No comma - dependent clause follows.
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Cite Laurie’s thesis
This does not appear to be in CDS. I STRONGLY urge the editors to reach out to Laurie's advisor and ask that they put this in CDS so we have a reference in a document system for this thesis.
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Event selection, data, and simulated samples are common to both methods.
Avoid 1-sentence paragraphs. Combine this with the following text.
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representative combination
"... representative combinations..."
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bTrig
This notation ,with a capital "T" in the subscript, is clumsy. I recommend we just simplify this to $\epsilon_{\mathrm{trig}}$, since we are only talking about b-jet triggers here.
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spot
"identify" ("spot" is too casual)
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A handy
Too colloquial. "A guide to decoding..."
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denoted∗
"... marked by a * ..." (this appears in a number of places - correct them all)
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denoted∗
"... marked by a * ..."
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Tables??
Fix broken reference.
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≈40%
Use $\sim$, not $\approx$, in this context.
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70% 77%
Missing comma in list.
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KL: Struggling to find these numbers in theb-jetcode. Probably need Carlo
Is this resolved?
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Further details of the performance and usage of the muon-jet chains inPbPbcollisions are detailed in365Appendix H and will be summarised here for the paper once we better understand from the HI experts366what plots they would like to have made public, how much detail they need us to cover here etc
Do we have more information about what is desired for this part of the paper? It feels highly unfinished.
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HI r
Was "HI" defined?
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to face the very
"... were required to be robust against the high-multiplicity environment..."
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es, th
"... small angles; this is the so-called..."
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so called
"so-called"
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golden probe
This is a colloquial phrase. Define it, or use a more general term.
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muon jet
Hyphenate "muon-jet"
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s [NEED REFERENCE!!].
Has this reference been identified?
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A
Has "A" been defined? At the very least, cite the paper for this analysis here.
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bbb, a
Missing parenthesis after"bbbb".
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mutliplicity
mis-spelled
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lead ion nuclei
"Lead ion nuclei" is a little redundant. Stick to just "Lead ions" or "Lead nuclei".
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B-hadron
"B" is usually reserved for the meson states of the b-quark. Since this is general, including potential baryonic states, I believe this should be "b-hadron".
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s, a
No comma - dependent clause.
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1TeVand
Space needed between "TeV" and "and"
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and
Remove comma - a dependent clause follows.
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pT
$p_T$ ot $\pt$
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jets, and c
No comma before "and"
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GSC
".. or GSC"
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Run 1 style
"Run 1-style" -> hyphenate, since it's used as an adjective.
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he exact d
"The exact" implies you have already discussed a target topology. Perhaps "An exact..." is better.
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, plus
Replace ", plus" with " and ".
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anti-Kt
"anti-$k_T$"
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volume that the tracking must be run o
"... the volume on which tracking must be run ... "
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GeVwere
Put a space after "GeV".
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Mean: 0.000098 +/- 0.000074RMS: 0.006637 +/- 0.000053Non-SplitMean: -0.000016 +/- 0.000090RMS: 0.007982 +/- 0.00006
These font margins should be improved, so the text doesn't run into the right bounding box. This goes for all of these plots in Figure 4.
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and which follows closely the offline primary vertex finding strategy
Make this phrase parenthetical
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weighted by found relative
This phrase, "weighted by found relative," makes no sense. Please rephrase.
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inηandφ.
"... in both eta and phi."
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removing
We're not removing overlapping regions, right? Rather, we are merging overlapping ROIs into one single ROI so as to incorporate the reality that they overlap. The image illustrates that, and not a removal of the intersection of two ROIs (which is what this language implies).
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downside of wasting
How about "...inefficient use of CPU resources..." instead?
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multiplcities
Spelling error
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selected
"selected" or "produced"? Not sure what the intent is here for the underlying verb. ROIs would normally result (be produced) from the L1 trigger, then be used in the HLT. So is "produced" the right word?
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processed
"Process" appears twice, once in the first two sentences. It has an over-use feel to it here. Replace one instance of "process" with an appropriate synonym.
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c
Remove this period
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.
Replace this with a semicolon.
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ns, an
Remove comma
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< μ >
This looks like $<\mu>$. Instead, use $\langle \mu \rangle$. I recommend defining this in LATEX to simplify:
\def\avgmu{\ensuremath{\langle \mu \rangle}}
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trigger167aware
hyphenate
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trigger aware
... trigger-aware... (hyphenate)
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, b
No comma needed here.
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Expand the trigger description for the paper draft.
This is needed.
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that combines the outputs of IP3D and SV1,
MV2 doesn't use the output of SV1; it uses inputs employed by SV1 to make decisions, but makes them instead using the BDT architecture.
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, all hadronictt
... and all-hadronic \ttbar ...
(remove that comma from this part of the sentence - it's improper to have one there)
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but no highpTlight leptons (electrons or muons) to trigger on
... but where there are no high p_T, isolated light leptons on which to trigger.
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to be able to search
... for searches for or study of ...
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secondary
Place secondary in quotes.
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ass, a
Remove the comma; what follows is a dependent clause.
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List of contributions
The list of contributions exceeds 1 page but does not extend to a second, so it runs off the bottom. We need to split this over 2+ pages.
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smu.app.box.com smu.app.box.com
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List of contributions
The "List of Contributions" overruns the page on which it is printed. We need to split this over 2+ pages to show everyone.
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