If you aren’t visibly producing, you aren’t worthy. In this context, taking time to lie dormant feels greedy, even wasteful.

You want your reward to give you greater awareness, greater affinity with life and a greater sense of your value and purpose in the world--not the value and purpose that you invent for your own delights, but the value and purpose that are intrinsic to your being here. This value cannot be exhausted. It will not leave you and will only grow as greater attention, time and energy are devoted to its expression and experience.

When you come to terms with your past, and realize that you’ve had accomplishments both then and now, you’ll also develop this sense of self-worth.