46 Matching Annotations
  1. Jan 2019
  2. www.correspoondence.com www.correspoondence.com

      Shouldn't this be the logo? Or something a little more spunky than just he title written a second time?

    2. Check Out Rankings

      Why would we link to the rankings instead of the case studies, or a big "Become a client" portal

    3. We are a food service satisfaction review site

      The term review makes this sound like it is not analytics. This entire front page feels very different from the rest of the website.

    4. A Division of Prevailing Trends, Inc.   IMPROVE YOUR "DOUGH"

      I like the catch phrase, but both of these feel like subtitles to Correspondence. Theres far too much space provided for each of them. Also listing a like to PTI seems very off as the first thing on the website. Maybe make it as a bar on the bottom of the site, or leave it on the contact page.

    5. I like each of the individual components of correspondence but their ability to mesh together confuses me immensely. The front page gives the impression that this is a ranking site, whereas the about would suggest its analytics for restaurants. The sites selling point should be clear from the front page, alongside testimonials and a contact form.

  3. www.correspoondence.com www.correspoondence.com
    1. Franklin Barbeque 900 E.11 St 512-653-1187

      Again, I feel like this is inline with the "Are we working with consumers in mind, or for company benefit" question, but I feel like for accessibility this could be redesigned to include pictures, website links, general quality of life additions.

    2. Blog

      This is an interesting Idea, but again I think it rubs against the grain of what Correspoondence is trying to do. Not many professional companies link personal blogs.


      If this is being advertised as a Georgetown company (As suggested by the about page) Why is it at the bottom? Also this scrolling is awful. I feel like there should be a drop down bar form the top, or making everything vertical and less blindingly white.

  4. www.correspoondence.com www.correspoondence.com
    1. pthomasmcrae@mac.com

      Maybe get a generic contact@correspoondence.com email that dumps itself into petes inbox.

    2. Correspoondence is a division of Prevailing Trends, Inc.

      This page feel like a bit of a mess visually.

    3. 707 Main Street Suite 202 Georgetown, TX 78626

      Is this the back of Kens Guitars?


      I really don't think this should be the very last available tab. Contacting the company should be the easiest thing you can do on the site.

    1. French Quarter Grill (pdf)

      This seems like a LOT of case studies. That seems like a strange grip, but it may be better to list one or two case studies and use the other names as a client list.

    2. Take a sneak peek at some of our case studies to see what information we can provide to you.

      This section is good, but it can be embellished a little. "Correspoondence will survey the quality of "moments of truth" with your staff in a variety of formats. In person visits, phone evaluations, and website critiques are just a few areas in which Correspoondence collects data."

    1. Instructions (pdf)

      Giving reports on other restaurants is a legit business that we studied in Hotel and Restaurant Management at my school. You can sell products like this as part of your auditing process, but it's not something you'd want to provide in detail until AFTER they have agreed to either trial your services or become your client.


      A lot of these pictures feel out of place. If a picture should help reinforce the point of your content, or emphasize something, this photo fails at that.

  5. www.correspoondence.com www.correspoondence.com
    1. Pete McRae, has an extensive background in food service and customer relations

      Hospitality might be a better term here. Also "Extensive background" may be downplaying it. If you listed the number of years he was working in food service it may have a much more resounding impression. Should the picture on the right be Pete? A picture of just "Georgetown Texas" Seems to rather limit our audience.

    2. improve and enhance a restaurant’s image and reputation among diners.

      A lot of my confusion and lack of clarity comes from the difference between this about page and the main page. The main page seems to focus on the ranking system that we provide, whereas the about focuses on analytics customer services.

    3. for both the customer and restaurant management.

      This really feels like a conflict of interests. Who's going to want to pay for their health inspection score to be posted online, or be ranked fourth compared to one of their competitors?

    4. Correspoondence conducts extensive consumer surveys, drawing out the reasons and motivations behind a diner’s decision to frequent a restaurant or not.

      Why isn't this on the front page?

  6. www.correspoondence.com www.correspoondence.com
    1. Check Out Rankings

      This really gives the impression that Correspoondence is a ranking platform, like Yelp, as opposed to something which strives to work with companies. Maybe a link to the case studies would be more advantageous? Also a lack of a contact link on the front, paired with the incredible amount of white space on this page leave lots of room for technical improvements.

    2. how their customers view them.

      So is this meant as an analytics tool for restaurants? It seems strange to market yourself as a tool for restaurants but simultaneously rank your clients against one another and expose their poor health inspector marks.

    3. A Division of Prevailing Trends, Inc.

      This also feels like a subtitle, but contributes to a greater problem of a confusing website narrative. Does correspoondence rank restaurants for consumers? Do they help restaurants improve through secret shoppers? Is it a promotional outlet for PTI?


      Nice catch phrase, but maybe subtitle "Correspoondence" rather than being placed three lines down?


      This font looks like it's a Microsoft Work effect. Also, shouldn't that just be the logo?

  7. Dec 2018
    1. .

      It's a nice piece. I enjoyed the second half more than the first. I feel like you became more comfortable with the writing and more confident in what you were saying. Your sentences are shorter or more concise and the content seems much more focused than earlier. The second half is pleasant and a joy to read, while the first feels like assigned reading for a class.

    2. You use the emdash a lot and, as much as I love am emdash, it's contributing to your unnecessarily complex sentences.

    3. six month


    4. Furthermore,

      Don't say furthermore...

    5. allows high

      My computer might be having a stoke but there's no space here for me

    6. high speed


    7. allows

      not sure this is the word you want here.

    8. time here, b

      My time here either

    9. desk,

      space for a desk, coffee table, and couch.

    10. or


    11. I like to think that our lifestyle here is neither spartan nor exorbitant, but my standard of living is far improved from Lyon

      I like this sentence. It's concise, clear, intelligent without sounding pretentious.

    12. here,

      no comma

    13. that experience,

      Which experience? I feel like the previous two paragraphs introduced enough different concepts that the antecedents here is unclear.

    14. The specter of upcoming departure influenced behavior in a way that removed one from reality — academics in Lyon mattered less at home, new friends would return to their countries of origin and communication would lapse, and why invest for comfort when somewhere so briefly?

      This sentence is 44 words!!!

    15. I existed permanently, but in a liminal state between arrival and departure, where the only variable was the passing of time

      I know it's completely subjective, but this really sounds like you're trying your best to sound pretentious. This isn't the way you speak.

    16. we’d

      Your writing style is fairly formal. Make sure you're being aware and intentional with your use of contracts.

    17. Two years of school near downtown Austin — coincidentally, a fifteen minute walk from my house of the final two undergraduate years.

      Again, your stylistic grammar choices effect the clarity of your sentence. "Two years of school near downtown Austin" is not a complete sentence.

    18. Not in Austin, but near, and often visiting. Twenty miles North. Sometimes, further

      Living twenty miles north of Austin or visiting twenty miles north? This is a confusing set of sentences. Unnecessarily truncated.

    19. fifteen minute


    20. ,

      remove comma

    21. coincidentally, a fifteen minute walk from my house of the final two undergraduate years.

      How is this a coincidence? What is a coincidence? That your house is near downtown?