not now, but sometime in the future maybe? — marry someone already up there?

The food, the warmth, the love, the laughter — the only thing that could’ve possibly made this day even better was if you’d been here to come with me. Next year, perhaps?

for trusting me enough to show me the real you

With you by my side, challenging me, encouraging me, I have discovered parts of myself I never knew existed. In the most unlikely of places, I have found a friend for life. You call this a year of transformation, and it is. Not only for you and for us, but for me as well. And it’s all because of you.

Not as long as I can prevent it.

Maybe you have found your calling? You could even combine it with your beloved brewing if you want, focusing your research on how to improve and develop Healing Potions?

I’m aware of your insatiable thirst for knowledge, after all

I know it’s all still there, preserved in your muscle memory, and even if you don’t believe me, we’ll have an entire week to get you into shape.

allowing monthly visits to your childhood home for the remainder of Narcissa’s sentence. They will require you to go in wandless and under auror supervision, but it’s better than nothing, right?

all tall and lean and annoyingly perfect.

pliant

But you trusted me not to, and despite my earlier teasing, your trust is not something I take lightly. Besides, it just felt right. Special. And, you know, sitting there with your gift in my hands, waiting for Christmas to arrive, I could almost feel your presence in the room, keeping me company in the silent night.

I’m proud to say that I did manage to wait until today

Merry Christmas, my dear dragon

I trust you not to open it before Christmas Day.

Pray tell, how do you figure you would manage to get yourself up on the Blacks’ family tapestry? Do not tell me you are considering embroidering your name on there by yourself.

Of us keeping in contact week after week. Of us slowly opening up and sharing our hopes and fears. Of us growing ever closer with every secret, with every confession. Of us, finally, after all this time — after everything — becoming friends. I do not know where I would have been today without you to keep me company through these lonely months, and frankly, I am not sure I would even want to find out. Thank you for always being there, each Saturday reminding me that I am, indeed, still alive. With love,

As much as I have looked forward to this year coming to an end, I still find it hard to fathom this letter being the last one I will ever write to you from my time in house arrest. This year has been one of transformation, for me personally, but also for this ‘something’ that has always brewed between us, this old, charged rivalry that we somehow, through letters alone, have managed to forge into something so much more, a solid bond of friendship, of trust and honesty, and, dare I say it, love.

I sincerely hope someone will be able to prevent you from having any say in the naming of your future offspring

I would much prefer someday being given the chance to show you in person.

Your expectations on my prowess will certainly not result in any future performance anxiety or anything.

Do you know if there have been any recent attempts at incorporating muggle medical science into magical healing? I have no idea why this idea fascinates me so much. It just does.

Did I not suggest teaching as a possible alternative to your auror career already months ago?

not even faced with the prospect of having to endure you as one of my teachers.

To know they have had the grand piano tuned, presumably for my benefit… It certainly makes one wonder.

Not only are you willing to spare me the experience of homelessness by inviting me to stay in your home, but you also take it on yourself to secure my future chances of a career? Just as you predicted, my ingrained pride struggles with the concept of it all; of acceptance, of gratitude. (Believe me, if it had still been in charge, I undoubtedly would have turned down every offer you just presented me with, no matter the consequences.) The man I was raised to become surely had not allowed himself to tolerate any of it, dismissing it on principle even if it was exactly what he secretly wanted. He would have cringed at the idea of accepting such humiliating charity, especially from his former arch-rival. Thank Merlin I am not him.

You can rest assured I still am, and will always remain your snarky prat. Just as I assume you will always be unable to resist rushing to the rescue whenever you see fit, regardless of whether people need saving or not.

I like my snarky prat just the way he is

You’d be flying for a living, Draco, and if we want to, we could fly seekers’ games over the grounds every night after classes before heading home.

Just think about it, okay? The

Draco

shocked

It’s only a part-time position, two First-Year classes per week plus the managing of the quidditch tournament. It’s barely any time off your schedule and can easily be combined with whatever else you plan to do with your life. I thought it’d be perfect for you, and before I knew it, the comment was out of my mouth.

But then I came to think of you.

Not full time, though, mind you; you won’t be rid of me that easily. I will still be staying here at Grimmauld Place — I figure I need to stick around if I ever want to make peace with this house — but McGonagall has offered to set up a direct floo connection for me in Hooch’s old quarters so I’d be able to come and go as I please.

teaching kids how to defend and heal themselves and others sounds so much more inspiring than any Ministry-related job I can think of, even a spot on the auror corps

you news-thirsty recluse

expecting you. I mean, why else would it suddenly have Kreacher see to the grand piano in the 2nd-floor parlour just the other day? It’s been played on before, with varying degrees of questionable talent and with no measures taken by neither house nor elf. Now, though, it’s suddenly tuned to perfection and just standing here, ready and waiting for you to come play it. I swear, if I ever get on good terms with this house, it’ll be none too soon.

Don’t worry, though. If you don’t mind sharing, there’s plenty of space in this house to accommodate both you and Lucy if you’d want to stay here. At least as a temporary solution? If you want to find a place of your own later on, we’ll figure it out too, I promise.

While I flounder, you know what you like, you know what you want, and you most likely know how to do it right, too. So, care to tell me? When you dream of me, what do you see? What do we do? What do we get up to in your mind that leaves you aching for more? If you tell me, I might want to try it sometime.

E rating

Dray-dreams

Either way, I certainly have a thing for you now. And not only your appealing looks and sassy wit, but your covert inner beauty too. Nowadays, I find it almost impossible to recall that one-dimensional prat I once thought was all there was to Draco Lucius Malfoy. Through a year of exchanged letters, I have come to know not only you, but Lucy too. (Not to mention this new, yet unnamed, badger of yours.) You’ve shown me that you’re a man of many layers, with a jewel’s worth of facets, all of them combined to make up the complex and captivating man I lo person you’ve become.

I mean, what if, on some level, that contradiction between emotions and actions is what’s always intrigued me so much about you? The urge to figure out what it was about you that just didn’t add up.

especially considering how close an eye I’ve always kept on you. (Yes, Dray, I’ve always had my eyes on you. At times, even to the point that my friends might have referred to it as an ‘obsession’.

Not the real you. Not like I do now

rather that you told me at all. And how. Godric. The sincerity. The raw honesty. Knowing you —  who I once used to think of as someone who’d do anything to hide his emotions at any cost, who I once used to love riling up at every opportunity, just for the chance to get a glimpse of any feelings hidden behind that solid mask of entitlement, disdain, and contempt, knowing you — this level of openness isn’t something you’ve practised often, if ever, and finding myself on the receiving end of your candid words, of your trust, it’s kinda a little breathtaking, to be honest.

Merlin, Dray, will there ever be a point in time when you won’t be able to surprise me anymore

my sappy Hufflepuff

Your ‘old Sixth-Year Malfoy obsession’? You mean to tell me it was mutual after all? And here I thought you just recently started to warm to me.

Three weeks, six days, and twelve hours. Will you be there waiting for me, my muse?

She is a strong woman, and mighty resilient, but will it be enough? I can only hope so

They are making me leave the manor, Harry. I don’t know why, but they are dismissing me from my own home. I have no idea where they expect me to go, especially since I do not even own a wand. I suppose they do not care. As long as I am out of here at dawn on 1st January, it does not matter to them if I end up lonely and homeless in the middle of winter. To be perfectly honest, they probably could not care less if I live or die.

That’s five years off my life I will never get back

Hufflepuff

to get to know you on a level I have never known another living soul, I have come to realise my rightful place could actually be with you after all. We may still be opposites in many aspects, both in personality and appearance, but while I once used to consider this a negative, the more I think about it, I appreciate the idea of opposites complementing each other instead, like night and day, sun and moon, yin and yang. If nothing else, it makes for an appealing aesthetic, does it not?

I can see how these past months’ correspondence with Aunt Andromeda has affected her too, how their tentative road back to sisterhood has made Mother start questioning things much the same way I have. The events of recent years have undoubtedly changed us both, and I dare say for the better. What they have done to my father is still anyone’s guess, but I hold out hope he will one day come out from his imprisonment a better man too. Maybe I am naïve to say such a thing, maybe he will end up all resentful and bitter towards everyone and everything, but troublesome as he may be, he still is my father. I cannot just give up hope he will be all right.

And now I am curious to find out what other muggle procedures we could learn from and adapt to magical healing, which, I am ashamed to say, have not advanced much this past century.

Not in a way that wakes you up all hot and bothered. Not in a way that leaves you hard. And you claim it does not freak you out, that it even turns you on? Welcome to the club. I have been waking up hard for you for years, so it is only fair you get to experience it too. And yes, I can very well imagine the shock of that first time. If you had not considered boys that way before then, I reckon it must have been quite the eye-opener.

So, you have been dreaming of me, have you?

Merlin, Harry, see what you do to me? You have turned me into a right Puff, and if those sketches were not enough to scare you off, this sappy letter certainly will. I am sorry, all right? Don’t mind me and my mushy heart; I will do my best to keep it together from here on out.

all I could do was fall all over again, for your bravery, your compassion, your benevolence. You had no reason to save me that day. You could have left me to my fate and no one would have thought any of it, And yet, you chose not to. You saved me, and the feeling of your back pressed against my chest, my arms wrapped around your waist, your body right there, and your scent invading my senses, making my head spin — every facet of that heart-stopping moment will be etched on my memory forever.

You came back for us

all it did was make me constantly worry about where you were, what you were up to, if you were still out there. If you were still alive. I told myself you still were, that as long as there was no news of your death, they could not yet have caught and/or killed you, that if they had, they surely would want to proclaim it from the rooftops.

Yes, Harry. It is you. It has always been you. From the first time I saw you, although I did not understand it then. Not until much later. When I eventually did, the resentment was almost unbearable. The realisation that I had fallen for you, my constant adversary, the one person I knew I never would be able to call mine… Merlin, it was the hardest blow. I hated my life, my twisted fate. And I hated you. Or, at least, I tried. And then, instead, I came to hate the fact that, however much I tried, I could not really hate you. Not the way I wanted to. Not in any way at all.

and I blame them all on you.

recite it by heart for years to come

Are you for real? Or am I stuck in a dream? It feels like I am, because surely it cannot be true. Surely you cannot want me like that. Not the way I have been wanting you for so long. My mind tells me it is impossible, and yet my heart begs me to trust what’s right in front of me; those words, written by your hand, in your family’s purple ink.

Well, I must admit, the first time I woke up hard after dreaming of kissing you, it kind of freaked me out a little bit. Okay, to be perfectly honest, it freaked me out quite a lot. Especially since, well, what you told me it might represent, dreaming of someone on the night of the Summer Solstice? It all struck me out of the blue that night, and since I wasn’t at all prepared, well, I guess you can imagine the shock. The disbelief. The confusion. I’ve had months to process it since then, though, countless dreams to get used to the idea, and just so you know, it doesn’t freak me out anymore. Not even a little bit. If anything, it turns me on it intrigues me. And your sketches haven’t exactly lessened the allure.

In case you’re still wondering, no, I did not go against your condition

Five weeks, Draco. Five weeks. Do you remember how impossibly far away it seemed at the beginning of the year? Not so far away now, is it? I’m looking forward to seeing you soon.

I would’ve found you Draco. I know I would. As long as you’d manage to stay alive, there wouldn’t have been a place on this earth you’d been able to go without me eventually finding you. Because I’m stubborn like that. (As if you didn’t know that already.) Especially when presented with a challenge; especially one involving you.

when I’d persist, he would’ve scowled and accused me of giving in to my old Sixth-Year Malfoy obsession.

Yes, of course I would have searched for you. Honestly, if it had been you missing, I most certainly would’ve started the search much sooner too

Seriously, Draco, sometimes you’re just too precious for words

Oh fuck, that shitstorm is going to be epic, isn’t it?

Suddenly, I want everyone to know how close we’ve become, how much you’ve changed, how different you are from what I always assumed. How much you’ve come to mean to me.

You WHAT?’ was my favourite, though, his jaw dropping to the floor as I mentioned our correspondence.

it seems like I was right

How surprisingly progressive of her to so readily accept you and your unconventional future family

which would be a fucking shame since I don’t think talent like yours should ever be suppressed but encouraged.

father

my fingertips once again darkened from my inability to resist tracing the dips and curves of your charcoal lines every chance I get

You wickedly talented you.

that explicit condition, issuing that challenge, was all you. You cunning, Slytherin you.

Because you know me

After that sublime piece of music you wrote for my birthday?

Dray

If your answer is positive, well, unfold it, I guess. Let’s see if you really are as ready as you claim to be.

And without peeking, you curious, naughty boy!

If it were true, how would you feel about it?

there is only one week left until I am finally allowed to walk out that door and get my first taste of fresh air, of my freedom, my future.

there is a limit to how much you can stretch out the holiday season without depriving it of its significance. I mean, as much as I love an all-decked-out Christmas Tree, how special would it feel come Christmas Day if I had already spent over a month in its presence? How much less special would Christmas wassail taste if I was offered my first sip from the goblet already in November?

If you hadn’t, I am not sure how our friendship would ever have survived the holiday season.

promise to hone my eye-rolling skills to perfection until we meet again. I must confess I like the idea of being able to make you laugh, though. After everything we have been through, surely we are both due for plenty of laughter in the years to come, aren’t we?

As if I would bump into my future husband the minute I step out of these doors. Women and their romantic, rose-tinted spectacles

She smiled. And her blue eyes sparkled when she told me how happy she was that I finally told her, that she has been suspecting it for years. She told me how concerned she has been for my sake, knowing an arranged marriage with a witch would most likely never bring me the happiness she always wished for her son. She told me how pleased she was that we seem to finally have found the key to enabling that happy future with the love of my life.

I told her I am gay. I told her that, if I ever were to fall in love with a man who returned my feelings, I would appreciate having the option to marry him if at all possible. I told her that I am not opposed to having children, but that I want to raise them with someone I love and cherish the way she once did my father, not someone I only live with to please my long gone forefathers. I told her I want her grandchildren to grow up with parents who truly love each other, not two miserable souls tolerating each other for the sake of family obligations.

How I could ever miss such a crucial detail is beyond me, but Merlin, I think she may be right. And so does Mother.

I know you did not do it for my sake, and yet, I cannot help but want to thank you for going through all that trouble trying to find him. He was not even your friend, not even a little bit, and try as I might, I cannot keep from wondering: had I been in his shoes, had I been the one missing after the war, would you have agreed to help search for me as well?

I would not want to impose.

would you mind accompanying me if I ever wanted to go see Greg? You could be in charge of handling anything muggle like a pro, like those weird parchment coins, while I do what I do best, i.e. look stunning and keep you on your toes

without exposing my ignorance straight away

I have always been far too self-conscious about what others think of me, never wanting to appear unknowing or risk making a fool out of myself

He has a whole other life now, a happy one, with a purpose and everything, while I am stuck here, locked away and useless, a pariah of the wizarding world

around to witness the events unfold, driven by a dire need to find out how it all would end, craving to know who out of the two of you would eventually survive the inevitable confrontation.

Still, I cannot help wondering. What if this is something he has always dreamt of but never had the guts to voice out loud

Never in a million years had I thought to search for him in the muggle world.

Yes, I’ve kept them all, and I’m grateful I did because… Draco, is it true? Do you really…? Me? All these years?

You don’t think I'm ‘ready’ to see your sketches? Come on, Draco. Try me. I’m sooo ready.

For your future happiness sake, I keep my fingers crossed that you do.

nowhere does it say the mother and the spouse need to be the same individual

The loophole

adorable

They’ll have you groaning with pleasure in no time, like little mouthfuls of heaven melting on your tongue

One and a half years later, he’s created a whole new life for himself, working in a little muggle bakery, spending his days kneading dough and icing cakes to his heart’s content.

We’ve found Greg.

One of the things that’s been keeping my mind occupied is the conclusion of a special mission that Millie, Luna, and I have been working on together for quite some time now

Now, even a string of fairy lights in a shop front is enough to lighten my mood, not to mention the ginormous Christmas tree they just erected in the centre of Grimmauld Place the other day.

I know they only meant well, and I can hardly blame them for trying to look after me, can I? I wouldn’t mind something a bit more low-key next year, though, and if you honestly want to support me through it, I bet you’d be able to distract me just fine. You’ve always had an uncanny ability to make me lose track of everything around us once you get going.

it, I wasn’t expecting you to be aware of or acknowledge my misery, but it’s nice to know that you care

I must admit I am sorely tempted to put that statement to the test, but no. I am not showing you anything yet. I am fairly certain you are not ready to see them.

I cannot help being touched by the notion that I am allowed to be part of your godson’s my cousin’s life in this way, even as I have yet to meet the boy in person.

It still says I need to marry and have a child with a pure-blood witch for the Malfoy family line to fully pass on to me and my descendants. Do feel free to prove me wrong.

Nice try, my friend, but as much as I am dying to get a glimpse of Harry the Ponce, there is no way you can convince me to let you see me with this atrocious excuse for a beard. Not at our first post-isolation meeting; not ever.

was that not exactly what your parents did for you? They sacrificed their lives for you, Harry; surely there is no greater sign of love and devotion than that. True, my parents risked their lives for me too, but not until after they had been foolish enough to put it in jeopardy in the first place.

Your life has barely begun and there is still so much for you to experience. Like having and doting on those children you dream of. Like finding and marrying the love of your life. Like exploring your destined, yet uncharted career path.

And you really died? Literally? I recall you alluding to it before, but to be honest, I thought you were only having me on that time (as it was, again, mentioned so casually in a sub-clause).

Granted you are willing to risk getting into a heated face-to-face debacle with me, maybe we could give these troublesome topics another try then?

I am baffled you allow them to walk all over you like that.

If I had, I would have known to address it properly in my latest letter, sending you whatever comfort I could from here. As it is, all I can do now is offer you my belated condolences and hope I will be able to be there for you next year, supporting you in any way that I can.

Tell me, what must Esmeralda do to coax your shy, artistic Lucy out of his den? Bat his eyelashes? Plead with imploring puppy crup eyes? Wrap himself around a preferred limb and squeeze? Just name it; he’ll do it. We’re both dying to see your sketches.

Like sharing your secret art with someone… Damn it, Draco, you can’t just say stuff like that and not expect me to combust with curiosity!

Circe, how I’d love to get my hands on a copy of it, maybe let the lawyer-to-be Hermoine have a look at it too. I don’t know why, but I can’t shake the feeling there’s a loophole in there somewhere just waiting to be found.

Lodie’ being short for ‘melody’, i.e. your nocturne

If I promise to use my grandpa’s hair potion on the day we’re finally able to meet in person, would you consider not shaving off your beard? Just for me? I could really use the laugh…

except for when you’re upset or excited when your hair gets all tousled and your pale skin flushes an adorable shade of pink

When I picture you in my head

because I bet it’s a sight to behold

I looked like a total ponce. I swear, Draco, you would’ve laughed your arse off.

know everything about my parents to even think of asking for anyone else in my family tree.

I have no doubt your parents would do anything for their son, and while dysfunctional, your tight-knit family was more than I could’ve ever dreamed of for myself growing up.

looking out for me, I know that, and I should be nothing but grateful for their care and concern. Yet, sometimes their well-meaning coddling makes me want to throw a tantrum. Especially when they gang up on me like that. When they do, I almost get the feeling they’re slipping into parental mode.

I heard your supportive voice in my head

and I told them I’d decided to drop out of auror training.

Almost no one knows about this, and even fewer know how close I was to deciding to stay there, to be reunited with my parents, with my godfather, and all the other people who had given their lives to protect me and the rest of the world from Riddle’s evil agenda. That number used to be one; it’s now two.

Yes, I have unknowingly carried a piece of Riddle’s soul within me for almost all my life.

Yet, here I am, about to divulge the most wicked of Riddle’s secrets, the epitome of dark magic, to you of all people.

If I’d been there with you, or you with me, maybe I would’ve been able to soothe your indignation straight away, instead of letting it stew unhindered for the past two weeks. Maybe if we’d been in the same room when I told you, you would’ve been able to see for yourself that I’m not upset about it anymore, that there’s really no need for retaliation on my behalf. I don’t know what to say to reassure you of this, other than ask you to trust me. How about saving your newfound urge for heroics for when you’re supposed to stave off my crazed fans instead? I swear I won’t turn down your offer of becoming my champion then.

your delicate temper

Your fuming dragon

A sweet relief, since I have always feared that you, at least on some level, suspected me of having dealt your esteemed mentor his death blow

Something heroic would have been to find a way to liberate them, like you did.

No, I did not know Mother sent that painting to her sister, but that explains where it disappeared to. Frankly, I had half a mind to ask her for it once I saw the finished result. I eventually refrained, thinking it would be conceited of me to assume that you would ever be interested in having it, but after reading what you had to say about it, I realise I may have been wrong in my assumptions. However, you should know that, unlike the photographs you gave me for my birthday, that painting does not necessarily depict the truth, created as it is by the subject’s biased mother

I cannot deny the simmer of anticipation your words have brought to my core. If I am being completely honest, though, my resignation vis-à-vis my future family arrangements was never due to the expectations of siring a child, but rather — as you may have gathered since we last breached the topic — the notion of binding myself to a woman knowing we will never be able to satisfy each other the way two spouses should.

If nothing else, I take it you at least know all about your grandfather Fleamont, the man behind at least three-quarters of the wealth in your Gringott’s vault?

Why ask for Lucy’s presence if you are only going to reprove him for his vengeful instincts the moment he is roused from his slumber? Would it be so horrible to allow someone to step in and be your hero for once?

Are you absolutely certain you do not want me to avenge the atrocities committed against you in your youth? By the people who were supposed to love you and care for you?

Firstly, you can’t just mention ‘a horrible evil thing parasitising your soul’ so casually in a sub-clause and then proceed as if nothing happened. I trust that you will elaborate on this topic in your next letter, or I am not sure I will ever be able to forgive you for the chills those words send down my spine every time they happen to catch my eye or echo through my head.

Anything you’d like to tell me, Dray?

Granted, Ron and I were polyjuiced into Crabbe and Goyle at the time, which is probably why your snotty wards allowed us entrance.

Esmeralda and I wish you both a pleasant week.

Every detail was stunning, every curve of your face, every line of your clothes, and Merlin, the lighting — I barely restrained the urge to trace my fingers over the picture to double-check if the warmth I saw licking your skin was as real as it looked. As for the sight of you, I must say I’m pleased you seem to be doing all right, all things considered. Sure, you’re paler than usual, but who wouldn’t be after spending almost a year and a half indoors? Apart from that, though, you look really good just like I remember you. Only healthier. Happier.

He wanted me to witness your hesitation. He wanted me to know that you never really wanted to go through with your horrendous task, that you had no choice, that he still believed in your ability to change.

I appreciate your concern and your sudden urge to seek vengeance on my behalf — I really do — but please promise me you won’t. We wouldn’t want you to get imprisoned again once you’re finally out of there, now would we? Think of all the quidditch matches and patronus practices and dance lessons we already have lined up following your release. Not to mention, my dire need for your supposedly outstanding fan-repelling services. We won’t have time for you being locked away again anytime soon, my dragon, so go back to your cave and cool off for a while, all right? I’ve made my peace with my past and I’m ready to move on. Move on with me?

the ones I was measured for when I first met you.

my home

Is that still the case?

I can’t wait to see them grow into their own person, taking on the world with all the joy and certainty I wish I also possessed. I’d love them so much, my battered heart wouldn’t be able to contain it all.

Great minds think alike, right

Arrows

Odd that the first time I do, it’s in search of something as trivial as a pot of ink.

family crest

I don’t want to be the reason they get stuck back there one day

my champion,

PSS One of these days, you are going to facepalm yourself hard enough to bruise, and when that day comes, I want you to remember that I warned you and that I am not to blame for your discomfort. If it helps, I already sport a matching bruise where my forehead recently collided with my desktop.

You are a good man. Good enough that I should not deserve to have you in my life. I am only too grateful that you seem foolish enough to disagree with me on that, and I will indeed savour your magnanimous nature for as long as you let me.

How could anyone treat a child like that, no matter the relation? I am so tempted to break out of this house right now to hunt your relatives down and teach them a thing or two, but I won’t. I will patiently serve my sentence to its end and restrain my urges, at least until I have acquired a new wand. The things I want to do to them is not something I would be able to manage wandlessly, but once I am back to full capacity, those muggles will rue the day they were born.

I cannot believe Dumbledore allowed it to go on for even a minute, let alone your entire childhood.

Why else would you wolf down every meal as if afraid the food would suddenly vanish from the plate before you?

Did they at least treat you decently before then?

if I had shown up at your safe house with my parents, would you have accepted our presence and honoured Dumbledore’s promise of protection, or would you have sold us out to the vultures?

surely that would have been too much of a risk

Did someone finally manage to do it? I highly doubt it, but how else to explain your uncannily accurate references to our common room? Who managed to let you inside? How?

Until then, feel free to be real with me at any time. Be wordy and broody if that is what you need. If anything, I appreciate knowing that you feel comfortable enough to share this side of you with me, especially since you seem adamant to keep it from everyone else. I will not profess to know your friends in any way, shape, or form, but even so, I bet they struggle too. I bet they are just as determined to save you from their troubles as you are them. You are all a bunch of stubborn Gryffindors, after all. Not that we Slytherins are much better in that department, and that is on top of our instinctual armour of self-preservation

Your heart is too big and caring to be content with catching and punishing bad people all day every day, no matter the horrible crimes they may have committed. You are too compassionate for something so destructive not turning you bitter and resentful before too long. If you ask me, I think you are destined for better things — positive, encouraging things — and I have a nagging feeling you are just as curious as I am to find out what that may be.

Anyone who matters, anyone who truly cares about you — the real you, not the idolised saviour — would support any life choices you make as long as they bring you happiness.

Life is not an obligation to fulfil

Shed those heavy, self-sacrificial stress robes at your earliest convenience. As far as I am concerned, I cannot remember you ever wearing something so unbecoming.

undress with me

cher

You want me to strip for you? Shrug off my ‘insecurity cloak’ and release my sassy wit for your pleasure?

Thank Merlin you’re over Theo. I wouldn’t have wanted to come between the two of you if you weren’t. Now I only have to figure out who the secret love of your life is, so I don’t accidentally kiss him too. I’m sure you’d never forgive me if I did.

Makes me wonder if my family ever had this kind of ink too, and what colour it would have been.

the very first wix my own age

And with this uplifting topic, I might as well seize the mood and let you cash in that rain check I once promised you.Yes

They don’t know about how I’m constantly questioning every part of my life, or the total lack of enthusiasm I feel for my chosen auror career.

ill-fitting insecurity cloak now

Merlin, Harry, I can’t even…

Not after all I have said and done, or the way I have treated her and her kin throughout the years. It is humbling, really, knowing she might be willing to do that one day (even as I know that if she did, it would only be for your sake and not mine). I hope I will someday get the opportunity to show her my gratitude.