8,270 Matching Annotations
  1. Oct 2018
    1. Not being able to be herself is the purpose she wrote this piece.

      not sure I follow how this speaks to purpose

    2. Like how in 1942, when she claims “I remember being caught for speaking Spanish at recess – that was good for three licks on the knuckles with a sharp ruler.”(Gloria)

      fragment in in-text use author's last name only

    3. On top of that, all the racist slurs and punishment she had faced growing up and encountering.

      edit for fragment

    4. her story

      is this the genre? try to be more precise, okay? personal essay? memoir? autobiography?

    5. weird stories

      not sure what this means

    6. As for Gloria

      try to use her last name or her first and last name-- using her first name is too informal, right?

    7. To also be able to set big dreams and to achieve them.                                   

      note fragment

    8. The audience he aimed towards we’re people that needed more inspiration and to endlessly keep pushing forward.

      please be more precise Do you mean "future teachers"? How do we know that he is speaking mostly to them?

    9. Which makes his genre motivational and poetry.

      edit for fragment

    10. all the big words

      can you be more precise? Do you mean metaphor, analogies from astronomy?

    11. Authors and writers share their story to give knowledge to people, but also to share their personal experiences. For each author or writer, they seek certain audiences in hopes to change or understand their view on certain topics. These topics could be as little as how to dye hair and other topics could be as big as a story on how it’s like to to lose both parents while you’re child.

      I appreciate your effort here to set things up for your reader but I wonder if you could be more to the point sooner? Can you reference our three key terms earlier and try to orient your reader more effectively?

    12. you may justif

      why the shift to "you"?

    13. Major Assignment #1

      I know the blog messes up formatting but try to skip a line between paragraphs, for your reader's sake, okay?

    14. Donavon Livingston’s Speech-https://www.facebook.com/HarvardEducation/videos/10153893399331387 Gloria’s “How to Tame a Tongue”-https://www.everettsd.org/cms/lib07/WA01920133/Centricity/Domain/965/Anzaldua-Wild-Tongue.pdf Pecha Kucka Presentation “Every 60 Seconds in Africa”- https://www.pechakucha.org/presentations/every-60-seconds-in-africa-dot-dot-dot

      not in MLA format please begin with author's last name, then first, alphabetizing as you go. Please include title of source, publication date, and date of access

    15. t’s the main reason why writer’s do so, to share their story and to get a better understanding before judging a book by it’s cover.

      I don't see a post write.

    1. to inform people

      Good--this is her purpose but who is her intended audience, do you think?

    2. it kinda

      too informal, right?--a lot like speech

    3. Faten Aggad

      Faten Aggad-Clerx

    4. genre is a pecha kucha which is for presentation of 20 slides and have 20 seconds of examination

      good

    5. The Pecha Kucha presentation “Every 60 seconds in Africa” was more complex than the others.

      in that it. . . Try to revise your topic sentence to help focus your paragraph's argument, okay?

    6. The audience will mostly be interested and engaged with her story

      please identify her intended audience explicitly, okay?

    7. er message by first hand experience.

      I appreciate the effort at transition but might you also revise the topic sentence to help focus the argument of your paragraph?

    8. Gloria Anzaldua’s “How to Tame a Wild Tongue”, she shows her audience

      Please rephrase, as here: in "How to Tame" Gloria Anzaldua shows her audience. . . .

    9. states his purpos

      please state what that purpose is

    10. by touching on such an important topic such as slavery.

      what does slavery have to do with teaching and learning? Dive deeper into his words, okay?

    11. future students

      you mean "future teachers," right? How does that fact shape what he says and how he says it?

    12. message through poetry.

      Yes: good

    13. From there that can also help decide the audience, which the work is intended for. The audience is the decision factor for the piece of work to see if it is effective or not. Then comes the purpose and why the author decided to form this piece of work. The creator has to clearly express the message he/she is trying to get across.

      This is helpful--thanks.

    14. There’s three key points that the author has to identify and execute.

      There are You might want to begin your sentences avoiding "There." which really isn't a subject. Try "Authors need to identify three points when writing"

    15. Aggad, Faten “Every 60 Seconds in Africa” a pecha kucha presentation February 29, 2016 Anzaldua, Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue?” Borderland/ La Frontera: The New Mestiza. Second Edition. San Francisco: Aunt Lute, 1987. 217. Print. https://english1103fall.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/howtotameawildtongue-2-1101.pdf Livingston, Donavon Spoken word commencement address Harvard University 2016 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9XGUpKITeJM  

      close to MLA form but not quite: missing dates of access and remember to be consistent with capitalization of titles

    16. I felt like I was digging so much deeper and realizing that presentation has so much to do with your piece of work. I never realized how complex writing was until analyzing these pieces of work. It was very different to what I usually write. In order to understand what you’re writing yourself, you have to understand the process and that’s what I took out of this assignment. I learned that those three elements are your guidelines in creating a piece of work.

      This is helpful but remember to answer the questions from the postwrite template, okay?

    1. Billy Collins’ commencement address shares many similarities to Livingston’s piece in terms of genre and audience. Like Livingston’s commencement address, Collins’ is a speech, but contains a poem at the end, allowing the piece to be placed in either category. Also similarly to Livingston, Collins’ piece is geared more towards the younger generation, specifically college graduates who are about to enter the “real world” as some might put it. These people have such busy lives that they often don’t stop to live in the moment. Teaching them to stop every once in a while and focus more on the present is the main purpose of the speech.

      I like the way you are trying to connect these writers but you seem to rush your analysis of Collins' speech, no?

    2. specifically those who are going into the education field.

      good But can you provide detailed evidence in support of your claim about audience?

    3. due to a poem written by Livingston taking up almost the entire speech

      not sure you need this part

    4. It’s easy to see why she chose this genre, because the photos are very effective in informing her audience. Aggad-Clerx had to think about people living in Western nations who believe these stereotypes while writing. She probably focused on the younger generation, as the younger someone is, the easier it is for their opinion to change.

      good observations And might young people take not only to her message but the delivery via images?

    5. Faten Aggad-Clerx’s PechaKucha “Every Sixty Seconds in Africa…” explores the stereotypes that some people in Western nations often have of Africa. Aggad-Clerx touches upon how many people view Africa as a country rather than a continent, and the stereotype that Africa has no urban development

      This is helpful but might you begin with a topic sentence that suggests how Aggad-Clerx uses genre, audience, and purpose?

    6. In order to create a successful piece of writing, all writers must develop what is known as the rhetorical situation. The rhetorical situation focuses on three main aspects of writing. One of these aspects is genre, which refers to the format the writing is in. Is it a novel or essay? A poem or a song? A text or a tweet? When a writer chooses genre, they must carefully choose one that would best suit the other two elements of the rhetorical situation: the purpose and the audience. The purpose is the main idea of a piece. For example, if someone creates a blog post explaining what they did over the weekend, the purpose of the post is informing people about everything the writer did. The audience of a piece of writing is the group of people that the piece is intended for. It’s important to have a target audience when writing, because if there’s no specific audience in mind, the writing could seem confusing, some aspects of it may seem out of place, and the purpose may not be clear. A writer must choose their audience based on the purpose of their writing. The intended audience for an action film, for instance, would be very different from the intended audience for a nature documentary.

      Your introduction is very nicely done--introducing your reader to the three key terms in a clear and accessible way.

    7.             Aggad-Clerx, Faten, ”Every Sixty Seconds in Africa,” PechaKucha, February 29, 2016. https://www.pechakucha.org/presentations/every-60-seconds-in-africa-dot-dot-dot Livingston, Donovan,”Lift Off,” May 25, 2016. https://www.facebook.com/HarvardEducation/videos/10153893399331387 Collins, Billy, “Commencement Speech Transcript,” May 19, 2008.  http://www.graduationwisdom.com/speeches/0135-Billy-Collins-Gives-Brilliant-Witty-Commencement-Speech-Address-At-Colorado-College-2008.htm  

      very close to MLA form You will just need to alphabetize by author's last name and include dates of access

    8. At the end of writing the paper, I reread it several times to make sure all of the required elements had been included, and that no typos had been made.

      can you say more about your choices? Perhaps giving examples?

    9. analyzing other works of writing on a summary level, rather than something like the rhetorical situation.

      understood--thanks

    1. who were most likely going to pursue their careers in the educational system

      good

    2. Which is a very powerful way to read a poem and is a great way to engage your audience.

      note fragment

    3. Which was a technique that Donovan Livingston also used while giving his commencement address to the graduates of Harvard Education

      note fragment although I appreciate the effort at transition

    4. Collins also went in a more informal, comedic path with his speech which also helped to keep his audience so engaged

      good observation: want to quote for an an example?

    5. He chose a different genre

      not sure I follow--isn't he giving a commencement speech?

    6. Unlike Faten’s work, Billy Collins was directed towards a live audience.

      nice try at transition but note that Aggad-Clerx also had a live audience

    7. It is infered that her audience consists of the younger generations because they are more open to change, and optimism and it is evident why she chose a Pecha Kucha as her outlet, as it is known that the younger generations are often on the internet and it is an easily accessible way to reach her purpose to her viewers.

      good, sharp analysis

    8. s a power point presentation with 20 slides and for each slide the “author” has 20 seconds to get their point across based off

      genre expectations

    9. Diving deeper into “Every 60 seconds in Africa”: A Pecha Kucha Presentation made by Faten Aggard-Clerx

      note the fragment This lapse is especially important given that this should be your topic sentence, right?

    10. he use of connecting these is shown through the works of “Every 60 Seconds in Africa”: A Pecha Kucha Presentation, Billy Collins Commencement address at Colorado College, and Donovan Livingston’s “Spoken word” Commencement address.

      I appreciate the care you are taking to introduce your paper.

    11. you can imagin

      why the shift to "you"?

    12. they have to consider the fact that their audience consists of young children who will not understand an in-depth speech using medical term

      exactly--good example

    13. These are key components of having a successful piece of writing

      good--this seems the start of a Big Idea about writing (your Theory of Writing)

    14. authors audience,

      author's audience

    15. Aggad-Clerx, Faten. “Every 60 Seconds in Africa…” PechaKucha 20×20, 29 Feb. 2016, www.pechakucha.org/presentations/every-60-seconds-in-africa-dot-dot-dot. Collins, Billy. “Poet Laureate Billy Collins Gives Brilliand and Witty Commencement Address at Colorado College, 2008.” Six Rules of Success | Graduation Speech 2009 | Arnold Schwarzenegger, 19 May 2008, www.graduationwisdom.com/speeches/0135-Billy-Collins-Gives-Brilliant-Witty-Commencement-Speech-Address-At-Colorado-College-2008.htm. Livingston, Donovan. “Lift Off.” Harvard Graduate School of Education, 25 May 2016, www.gse.harvard.edu/news/16/05/lift.

      pretty good form needingl only dates of access

    16. POST WRITE: Revising this draft was a bit of a challenge for me because usually when I am writing everything will just flow and going back and making

      This is a thoughtful post write but don't forget to follow the post write questions (on our web page).

    17. I made them a lot stronger

      okay: an example?

    18. For example, in my first draft the intro was a lot more wordy as well as some of the body paragraphs and that made the essay a lot more foggy and confusing, taking out some of those elements helped make my writing a lot more clear and understandable.

      nice--can you give a more detailed example of the kind of changes you are describing?

    1. that our voices are something that should be heard and not brushed off.

      I think you are very close here, although again need to be more precise as to who you are talking about

    2. her purpose was to spread the issue with the nation that there’s more than what you put into the society.

      yes but be more precise?

    3. o inform the audience that we all have a bigger purpose then to not speak on whats on our minds

      again, close but you need to be more precise and engaged with the talk

    4. was to the people that obligated to not speak what’s on their minds and to the people that try to shut powerful minds up.

      okay: try to be more precise and dig deeper into her writing: she's teaching out in part to people who live on the borders of languages and cultures but also people who are monolingual and who try to dictate what language is proper to people like Anzaldua

    5. people that doubt themselves or to the people that doubt others in society or even on education.

      Can you be more precise and dig deeper into his talk? His audience seems in part to be future and present teachers, no?

    6. what africa was

      capitalize Africa

    7. Donovan Livingston, Spoken

      punctuate: Donovan Livingston's "Spoken Word Performance" or at it officially titled, "Lift Off."

    8. There’s primarily only one audience that the writer writes for but it’s how you interpret the writing piece as the audience

      not sure I understand this topic sentence. May I suggest as I did earlier that you not begin with There" and start with the proper subject? Writers have primarily one audience with which they try to communicate

    9. which is to be persuasive. She was explaining to speak about what’s on your mind.

      This seems to belong to a section on purpose, no?

    10. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue” by Gloria Anzaldua genre is personal narrative

      okay: good.

    11. er genre is political journalism

      actually, a Pecha Kucha or multimedia slide presentation

    12. writinging

      typo

    13. There are unlimited amount of genres in the world that writers create.

      How about starting this key sentence with a clearer subject? Writers can drawn from an unlimited amount of genres.

    14. When the audience actually understands the purpose of the writing the writer’s purpose is fulfilled.

      This intro is helpful but I don't follow the last sentence or understand its logic.

    15. Most writers write for their to see them learn

      typo?

    16. Post write I feel that in my first draft I didn’t explain what the genre exactly was and now I have stated and explain why the genre I have stated correlates with each writer. Also i feel i have written a paper with the same prompt before. Ive pulled the genre, audience and purpose out of a reading before and explained them.

      This is helpful but doesn't address the questions in the postwrite template.

    17. Aggad, Faten “Every 60 Seconds in Africa” a pecha kucha presentation February 29, 2016 Anzaldua, Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue?” Borderland/ La Frontera: The New Mestiza. Second Edition. San Francisco: Aunt Lute, 1987. 217. Print. https://english1103fall.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/howtotameawildtongue-2-1101.pdf Livingston, Donavon Spoken word commencement address Harvard University 2016 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9XGUpKITeJM

      close to MLA form but needing a few elements:dates of access (and in Aggad-Clerx's case the location of the presentation with date of access).

    1. to tell people t

      young? old? Europeans? Africans? Can you be more precise?

    2. My last story

      can you use a more precise term? The genre is a Pecha Kucha or multimedia slide presentation rather than a story, right?

    3. feel like with that quote he is trying to say that if you mess with people of a different language you are messing with everyone of a different language and I feel like the purpose is to tell the government let us speak our language and not get hurt for it or prepare for a fight back.

      This paragraph seems to have lost its focus.

    4. Another story I thought was a good choice for my assignment is Gloria Anzaldua how to tame a wild tongue a

      let's work on developing a more meaningful transition and topic sentence, okay?

    5. A thing that Donovan said is “Our stories are ladders to make it easier to touch the stars, so climb and grab them, keep climbing and grab them” he is basically telling people to reach for dreams and never give up on trying to reach them.

      Is he speaking to teachers here? Can you tie this powerful passage to your analysis of audience?

    6. The story I’m writing about is Donovan Livingston’s commencement address which is in the poetry genre and the audience he is writing for is to a teacher and all the school districts,

      okay: you've identified genre and audience but can you step back a bit and produce a topic sentence first? That will help you develop your analysis which right now seems hurried.

    7. For my assignment I have to analyze  three stories and the stories I chose are Donovan Livingston’s commencement address, Gloria Anzaldua how to tame a wild tongue, and Pech Kucha every 60 seconds in Africa I chose to analyze these stories because I thought that the stories would have a lot of meaning in them.

      Can you introduce our three key terms and define them?

    8. Gloria Anzaldua how to tame a wild tongue, and Pech Kucha every 60 seconds in Africa I chose to analyze these stories because I thought that the stories would have a lot of meaning in them.

      Please edit for mechanics: punctuation and capitalization?

    9. The purpose is just to inform people on whats happening and that they should help because we all need the same things

      I don't see a post write I don't see a list of Works Cited

    1. In this paragraph he uses the words “when” and “wait” over again to make the audience understand his point.

      I sense the need for a conclusion, don't you?

      I don't see a list of Works Cited

    2. King knew his audience very well and was very relatable and personal in a direct way

      how do we know that he is aware of his audience? how does that affect his tone and message and purpose?

    3. “Brimington City Jail Letter”

      correct title?

    4. She makes an effort to make her audience think differently and challenges them to look at their own flaws because not everybody’s perfect.

      move earlier in the paragraph in the part about purpose?

    5. The genre that she chose can show the audience that you can explain your message without using just words. She is most likely writing to a younger audience because they aren’t so firm on their beliefs yet.

      good connection between genre and audience

    6. what we see on the headlines, it’s like every other place- poverty, greed, power hungry.

      edit for comma fault?

    7. Her message is to spread awareness

      her purpose?

    8. Collins’ message compared to the message of Aggad-Clerx “Every 60 Seconds in Africa… A Minute Passes” is different

      I appreciate the effort at a transition but can you revise to focus on genre, audience, and purpose?

    9. He understands his audience

      again, provide evidence?

    10. genre of writing is a graduation speech for the graduating class of Colorado College 2008

      want to revise your topic sentence that includes not only genre but audience and purpose?

    11. Collins’ purpose is to motivate, prepare, and tell the audience about the future and how time is very limited in life

      good--can you provide quotation in support?

    12. In Billy Collins Commencement Speech, his

      In his commencement address, Bill Collins. . . .

    13. the readers expectations.

      reader's

    14. Writing in the Works,

      italicize title?

    15. What is the genre of the writing? What is the message of the writing? What is the purpose and who are you writing for? What kind of voice or sound are you trying to portray?

      all good and important questions for writers

    16. To help to develop your own rhetorical situation you must know which questions you should be answering such as,

      sentence broken up

    17. Writing can be a way of communicating, but it also can be a way to explain your ideas to make sense to the reader.

      not sure I know the difference

    18. you must understand

      why the use of "you"? who is your intended audience?

    19. Are the transitions between the paragraphs okay?

      good question

    1. increase your

      why the shift to "you"?

    2. Her purpose was to not only raise awareness but to also make us take a peek at ourselves in the mirror to realize we are the same.

      good but notice how this important point is buried in the middle of this paragraph

    3. was aimed towards both people of color as well as white people.

      Europeans, first of all?

    4. “Every 60 seconds in Africa”, a 20 slide presentation, give us the same writing experience.

      revise topic and transition for more precision and meaning?

    5. also referred to teachers as “stars” (2:13) where they shine knowledge across the sky.

      teachers or the students they teach?

    6. want to get out as soon as possible.

      who plan to go into teaching, right? How does that shape his genre and purpose and message?

    7. same techniques

      can you be more precise?

    8. he was trying to tell minorities around the world that she is unique

      is she speaking only about herself? who are her intended readers, exactly? What does she have in common with them?

    9. Her audience was focused around minorities

      please define who these minorities are exactly: people living on the border of languages and cultures

    10. a long a boring speech, she wanted to

      edit for comma fault, here and elsewhere (comma used as a period)

    11. Her genre was a short story

      really? autobiography? personal essay? memoir?

    12. A purpose isn’t necessarily the message they are trying to send out but rather the reason why they want to send it out.

      good--precisely

    13. “Who am I trying to reach?” or “Why am I doing this?”

      good questions to ask

    14. Each element go

      goes

    15. about the meanings genre, audience and purpose and why their important

      rephrase? think about the concepts and importance of . . . .

    16. you’re taught

      why the shift to "you"?

    17. Knowing the Background Knowledge

      please skip a line between paragraphs, for your reader's sake

    18. Post Write

      thanks for this helpful post write

    19. These elements are just a few of the many pieces of writing we should concentrate on not only for presentation wise but for ourselves as well.

      I don't see a list of Works Cited.

    1. She sought to kick

      to inform and to challenge her audience about such stereotypes?

    2. o inspire educators t

      good

    3. This brings me to my next question-

      I appreciate the attempt at transition but perhaps you could create one a bit more meaningful?

    4. or King, his genre was a non-fiction informational letter. Livingston’s spoken word address, as well as Aggad-Clerx’s Pecha Kucha are non-fiction as well, though the genre changes slightly. Livingston is in the form of a spoken word poem, delivered as a speech. Every 60 Seconds in Africa could be seen as a speech as well, though it was intended to be an informational 20 slide presentation. Livingston’s intended genre for Lift Off  seems to just be just another commencement address, but it was also meant to spark inspiration in his audience.

      why did these writers choose these genres?

    5. at comes with a set of readers’ expectations.

      good observation

    6. She uses not only pathos, but logos to get to her audience. The pecha kucha is fact based, informing the readers or listeners, but many of the slides are backed with pictures and anecdotes that evoke emotion.

      who is her intended audience, do you think?

    7. teaching experiences to humanize the subject of his work and connect to the reader’s on a personal level

      good--please provide textual evidence?

    8. In Donovan Livingston’s spoken word commencement address, he too has the upper hand in knowing his audience, future teachers.

      good--want to create a new paragraph, for your reader's sake and for the sake of clarity?

    9. . King knows his audience and knows how to word his message to speak to them specifically

      good--can you be more precise? How is his writing meant to appeal to this particular audience?

    10. Knowing your

      why the shift to "your"?

    11. Post Write

      Thanks for the post write. I don't see a list of Works Cited, per MLA

    1. Works Cited

      missing a third source (Blau and Burak not included)

    2. He was very aware of who his audience was, he was a religious leader himself.

      yes: say more. How does his awareness of audience shape his tone and message and purpose?

    3. for multiple audiences

      why include Blau and Burak? Have you identified Anzaldua's audiences precisely?

    4. In How to Tame a Wild Tongue by Gloria Anzaldua, the message is in a completely different approach,

      different, how? Can you work on the transition? I'd like to see a clearer topic sentence to give a sharper focus to this paragraph

    5. to genre i

      What genre has she chosen?

    6. has their own set

      its own

    7. that requires particular rhetorical moves(3).

      please use quotation marks when quoting, okay? What does the phrase "rhetorical moves" mean to you?

    8. Writing in the Works

      italicize title?

    9. Audience is a select crowd or group of people that are listening, spectating and even reading. Purpose is the author’s reason for writing, every author out there has a purpose when it comes to their work. Genre is the kind of writing it is, there are various amounts of genres that can be put into writing.

      these definitions are helpful

    10. Every writer has a purpose in their writing, it can be a message to a certain audience, they can be giving good advice or even giving you information you didn’t even know about, etc.

      edit for comma faults (using comma like period)?

    11. if you did

      why the shift to "you"?

    12. Blau, Susan, and Kathryn Burak. Writing in the Works. Houghton Mifflin, 2007. Print. -Anzaldúa, Gloria. How to Tame a Wild Tongue. Borderlands / La Frontera: The New Mestiza. Aunt Lute Books, 2012. Print. -King, Martin Luther, Jr. Letter from Birmingham Jail. 16 Apr. 1963. Web.

      not quite MLA format--I'd be glad to help you.

    1. Your ethnic identity

      why the shift to "your"?

    2. Hwnildes yet proud, quielos yet wild, noso- lros losmexicanos-Chicmws will walk by the crumbling ashes as we go about our business. Stubborn, persevering, impenetrable as stone, yet possessing a malleability that renders us unbreak- able, we, the meslizas and mestizos,will remain.

      please quote accurately--lots of typos here

    3. “There is the quiet of the Indian about us. ”

      cite page?

    4. Anzaldua’s audience for this chapter in a book is everyone that feels like they are being discriminated against because of who they are.

      Can you be more precise? Dive deeper into her writing to identify the people whom she is reaching out to?

    5. s fiction

      not following You mean autobiographical (non-fiction)?

    6. When Gloria Anzaldua wrote “How To Tame A Wild Tongue,”she wanted to recall and explain her experiences as a young chicano girl

      transition? More focused topic sentence?

    7. purpose is

      to persuade?

    8. wants these men

      how does his awareness of his audience shape his tone and message?

    9. King’s target audience for this letter is the white clergymen who haven’t experienced anything like King has

      yes want to start a new paragraph?

    10. “Never before have I written a letter this long — or should I say a book? I’m afraid that it is much too long to take your precious time. I can assure you that it would have been much shorter if I had been writing from a comfortable desk, but what else is there to do when you are alone for days in the dull monotony of a narrow jail cell other than write long letters, think strange thoughts, and pray long prayers?”

      cite page?

    11. very formal letter

      why does he choose to write a letter?

    12. Martin Luther King Jr’s “Letter from Birmingham Jail” shows the immense passion by Dr. King towards racism and even though he is in jail, his courage and persistence. T

      yes but can you provide a transition and a topic sentence focusing on genre, audience, and purpose?

    13. In the end his whole purpose from this was to inspire the graduates and tell them not to squander their time and live life to the fullest while they can.

      Can you break up this long paragraph--for your reader's sake?

    14. the speakers goal

      speaker's

    15. The goal for these speeches are to inspire the graduates and give them a charge

      good--purpose is clear

    16. Throughout his speech he Billy Collins uses analogies and many other literary devices to convey his audience

      okay--maybe an example would help? But how do these "analogies" fit your theme of rhetorical choices (genre, audience, purpose)?

    17. is a speech

      you mean a commencement speech?

    18. by Billy Collins

      why repeat his name so soon?

    19. s by Billy Collins, this is his Commencement Address at Colorado College in which he gave to the graduates of that year.

      note comma fault and some phrasing issues

    20. This first piece writing

      of writing

    21. The way that each and every writer chooses the audience they want to intrigue, what genre they will write in, and what purpose they will write with is what makes each and every work by a writer special in its own way. Audience is defined as who the work is intended for. A audience can be people ranging from very young to old, and it can be for any type of person. Genre can be defined as the type of writing that a author uses to make it different from other works. Purpose is defined as the authors reason and intent for writing.

      This is a helpful introduction.

    22. Works Cited Anzaldua. Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue.” PDF   “Poet Laureate Billy Collins Gives Brilliand and Witty Commencement Address at Colorado College, 2008.” Six Rules of Success | Graduation Speech 2009 | Arnold Schwarzenegger, www.graduationwisdom.com/speeches/0135-Billy-Collins-Gives-Brilliant-Witty-Commencement-Speech-Address-At-Colorado-College-2008.htm.   Luther King Jr. Martin. “Letter from Birmingham Jail” PDF

      incomplete--not in MLA format. I'd be glad to help.

    23. all had their own purposes for writing what they did and why they did it.

      I don't see a post write.

    1. has been discriminated against along with those who discriminate to help them see the opposite side from where those who are being discriminated against as stated in the text 

      who precisely?

    2. tell teachers to instead of looking at students as just another piece of the puzzle to look at each and everyone of them as a Separate intellectuals who all have potential to blossom and become something great.

      good

    3. inst people like her

      yes: but who are they? Can you describe her audience more precisely?

    4. h is a poetic speech as

      why doe he choose a poem?

    5. “Letter From Birmingham Jail” as

      but why does he choose to write a letter?

    6. letter from Birmingham jail” the genre is best portrayed as a nonfictional letter based on the actions occurring in Birmingham as stated by Martin Luther kings

      edit for capitalization and apostrophe?

    7. The dictionary defines Genre as “a category of artistic composition as in music or literature, characterized by similarities in form ,style or subject matter.”

      good--helpful

    8. portray best what the true meaning of genre ,audience and purpose are.  

      meaning . . . is

    9. *After thoroughly reading through all five pieces of literature I’ve decided that

      why the asterisk *?

    10. uring the years I’ve been alive for. Throughout my years I’ve began to grow fond of the idea that we are all brought up and bred differently from each other just imagine a world where we all speak the same and none of our differences were to define us.

      you will need to edit for punctuation, no? And I"m not exactly sure what the opening is doing, to be honest.

    11. Throughout the 18 years of my life growing up I’ve never really thought about how who you are and what defines you would create as big of an issue as it has

      please keep these lines formatted for ease of reading. They are broken up.

    12. of creating good writing and also becoming a good writer.

      I don't see a post write.<br> I don't see a list of Works Cited

    1. piece, the audience may be people who were in the same boat as her, discriminated against.

      yes--good. But why were they discriminated against? Dive deeper into her work, okay?

    2. Moreover, he even addressed it to Rabbi’s and Pastors directly, he knew exactly who he was writing to and for.

      edit for comma fault (comma used as period) Okay--you've identified his audience. Can you describe how that awareness helps King shape his tone and message?

    3. “I came across your recent statement calling our present activities “unwise and untimely.”

      good--cite page number?

    4. I hear the anger rising in his voice. My tongue keeps pushing out the wads of cotton, pushing back the drills, the long thin needles.”

      cite page?

    5. autobiographical and narrative genre

      okay: good

    6. etters are much different than other types of genre of writing, they can be personal,

      good

    7. Starting and ending with address who he is writing to, the clergymen, and ends with a sincerely. L

      fragment

    8. Letter from Birmingham Jail

      put title in quotation marks?

    9. He shares advice

      yes: good

    10. With one piece of writing we’ve read (the transcript), William James Collins, also known as Billy Collins, Commencement Address at Colorado College, in May 2008.

      fragment?

    11. Starting off first with genre

      can you work on this transition? It needs to fleshed out, I believe.

    12. In writing, purpose is to do something with determination, trying to persuade the reader to agree with the author, wanting to force the reader to think, act a specific way.

      good

    13. Genre is more basically defined as a category or class of artistic composition

      okay--good. You might move this sooner.

    14. This certain project had to be based on a specific genre, mine was adventure.

      note the comma faults: using a comma like a period between sentences

    15. Always stressing out over every word and what I had to do.

      edit for fragment

    16. Collins, Billy. “Poet Laureate Billy Collins Gives Brilliand and Witty Commencement Address at Colorado College, 2008.” Six Rules of Success | Graduation Speech 2009 | Arnold Schwarzenegger, www.graduationwisdom.com/speeches/0135-Billy-Collins-Gives-Brilliant-Witty-Commencement-Speech-Address-At-Colorado-College-2008.htm.   King, Martin Luther Jr. “Letter from Birmingham Jail.” The Negro Is Your Brother, vol. 212, The Atlantic Monthly, Aug. 1963, pp.78-88. No. 2, https://web.cn.edu/kwheeler/documents/Letter_Birmingham_Jail.pdf   Anzaldua, Gloria. “How to Tame a Wild Tongue”. Borderlands / La Frontera: The New Mestiza. Aunt Lute Books, 2012. Print.

      pretty good form but needing to be alphabetized and given dates of access. not sure what Schwartenegger has to do with the Collins' address, though

    1. He says, 2)

      not sure what the number is doing here

    2. the Rhetorical

      why the capital letter?

    3. he genre displayed here is a letter, written from his jail cell correcting the misconceptions held by the clergymen. The purpose of Kings letter was to defend the strategy of nonviolent resistance to racism.

      good on both counts but why wait until the end of the paragraph to make these observations?

    4. Which means he’s innocent.

      edit for fragment