- May 2017
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rorrim.arganee.world rorrim.arganee.world
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(yiy lmr y Qfybmu-Egpj-uyllyzc
Lmr zjmmbw jgicjw ;N Wms'jj yjuywq zc y uyllyzc rm kc~
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That, or you’re just contagious Shadow Girl…
Kw fmu rfcqc rsplq fytc ryzjcb...fyfy
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Lavinia-like?
Tcpw.
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the only one I’m good at
Wms ylb kc zmrf...^.^
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bore-boringly
Fcw!
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wannabe
Wms hsqr bml'r ilmu ufcl rm osgr, fsf Qfybmu-Egpj-uyllyzc-wmspqcjd?
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- Apr 2017
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www.mcsweeneys.net www.mcsweeneys.net
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The Resistance
I like the sound of this. I think we really needed to do something different.
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Millennial Stereotypes ’n Diversity Bingo™ online game!
Try it out! Does anybody know somebody who would be interested? Spread the word!
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Shoot first
Our strong suit~
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17 cents
And an extra 15ish cents on that 17 to a man-folk one! (We're equal opportunity, after all ^.^)
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A zookeeper?
Are we making fun of zookeepers now? Is there no barrier to low for this kind of comedy? I am alerting the Zookeeper Alliance immediately.
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While you’re there, be sure to visit
I won't be there. This whole column is a travesty. Hasn't Trump made parody illegal? Isn't there a wall somewhere that negates this kind of humor?
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equal
Equal Schmequal There is no such thing as a prequel to this rediculous saga.
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#ThirstIsTheRealTerrorist
Thirst is no laughing matter.
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shooting skin tight women’s T-shirts
You think it comes in size XS?? I feel like a lot of companies don't think about thin people when they create their clothing... ): very unprofessional and adds to the skinny-shaming culture in our society
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PepsiCo-opted Protest-a-palooza Experience®
Love the name!
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Expressing emotions and not murdering anyone, while wearing a headscarf.
They're not all monsters. We didn't want to generalize on such a negative topic.
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May we all have the bravery to one day flick off our expensive custom made blonde wig and walk away from our highly paid photo shoot
勇気!!!
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We know, we know, it’ll be hard to choose which poor decision to make!
If you're unsure, it's highly suggested you ask a nearby mayonnaise-looking man-folk. They know everything
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extremely obvious actress in a headscarf
We needed to make the point of advocating harmony across different cultures as clear as possible.
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She was everywhere, in a headscarf. Expressing emotions and not murdering anyone, while wearing a headscarf. Did you see her?
Oh I saw!!!! I almost put headscarf on to join her and emphasize NO THREAT with two headscarf ladies.
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inappropriate
Speaking of inappropriate, we just received word that our request to use MOAD in our next campaign is a go (from corporate). Pepsi can now be referred to as "The Mother of All Drinks" Yeah booooyyy!!!! We are so FREAKING GENIUS it's not even funny$$
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some sort of lady-related charity
Because random charities that we have no knowledge of their purposes are the best recipients.
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So, inspired by yet another great decision on our part, we’ll be launching pop-up Picture Yourself In a Headscarf photo studios! You’ll find them along popular protest routes in gentrified urban areas only or at your nearest Starbucks. So Instagram yourself in one of our headscarf cutouts with the hashtag #ThirstIsTheRealTerrorist or in one of our branded Tostitos® cutouts with the hashtag #YouCantBuildAWallAroundFlavor.
Here guys! I made it easier for you! Feel free to add your face!
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the nonwhites, and the gays
Don't worry, there is a sound feature on the easy levels--convenience is the creed~ Wouldn't want to exclude any hard-at-sight consumers
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For each text we receive, we’ll donate 17 cents to some sort of lady-related charity as a hollow gesture about equal pay.
Hollow, you say? Au contraire, this move has leagues of depth
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Tropicana® Orange You Glad Slavery Was Abolished Pavilion
This isn't insensitive It's a meaningful reference to the progress we have made as a society.
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17 cents to some sort of lady-related charity as a hollow gesture about equal pay
Great idea! No more, though, it will be too much
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Girls Just Wanna Have Fundamental Refreshment!
Can I get an, how you say, Amen?
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spot the stereotypes, the nonwhites, and the gays
if you're asking me, I think the commercial went too overboard with this Diversity Bingo™! Needs more heterosexual white men, if you ask me... the media doesn't do them justice enough today.
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NON-THREATENING LADY IN HEADSCARF
See? Pepsi depicts Muslims in a peaceful manner. What a well rounded family company!! On my way to buy their stocks now.
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branded
It's a clever play on the physical scarring that was dealt to those who deserved it at the time. It's not at all immoral to throw into the mix.
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our online event map
Yes please! I'd love to know when they're shooting the next one. I wanna be in that big crowd!!
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PepsiCo-opted Protest-a-palooza Experience®
We're hoping to recreate the USA for Africa video during one of our upcoming events....https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zi0RpNSELas
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a wellspring of profound self-loathing
I'm literally from the shadows of the Other Side's darkest corners and I've never heard of a better deal, tbh~
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The Resistance will be brought to you by PepsiCo
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The Big Movement
Big is an understatement. This is HUGE it is so great, really great, it is a-mazing.
We, with PepsiCo will Make Advertising Great Again.
You read it here.
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wipe off her lipstick
This would be a perfect arena to roll out our new slogan, "The Struggle is Real"...I mean, like, who can't relate to having no lipstick on. What could be worse than that?
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We at PepsiCo are opportunistically thrilled and financially agog at declaring ourselves the unofficial sponsor of The Resistance!
This video inspired millions<3 Share the Wealth!
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headscarf
Headscarf - a classy touch, da, and becomes a very generalized representation of different cultures and religious affiliations. Smart for PepsiCo to save so much money and make everyone feel included (so important to goaafy society these days, after all).
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7-Up Drink Up to Rise Up®
getupstandup
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We will be rolling out a fully branded
We're working on some strategical product placement opportunities which clearly show our top competitor being consumed by losers, poor people and anyone over 45. Sweeeeet!!!
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to wipe off her lipstick with her bare hand
Hey, now, this isn't the Oppression Olympics. Some of these rouges seriously stick! The Struggle (TM) is real~
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Cheetos®, Diet Mountain Dew®, and a wellspring of profound self-loathing.
I am snack-want, beverage-want, but not self-loathing-want! Why is bad feeling win-gift?
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a Pepsi Jenner-ation
We love the idea of branding generations as Jenner-ations... Think of all the generations we can get rocking out, and they should be drinking Pepsi in videos like this (Tom in graphics says we can CGI it in)
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Tropicana® Orange You Glad Slavery Was Abolished Pavilion where we’ll be serving complimentary branded tin cups of our Pure Premium Orange Juice
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Picture Yourself In a Headscarf
I think Tweak in a Turban has merit, too~ judging from what I know of the Somethingness world...
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too edgy
Nothing is "too edgy" after this post. >.>
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Protest-a-palooza Experience
So "protest" is full-same to "party" or "theatre-perform"?
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Doritos #AllChipsMatter
I'm glad that they're realizing that all chips are equal and deserve to be included in this statement. Even though Doritos are dominating the market and virtually need no more advertising to ensure their success, supporting and including them is just as important as supporting and including their less successful and oppressed marketing brother, Bickel's ™ chips.
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Did you see her
We need to tap in to the marketing angle of head scarves for the middle class white housewife demographic
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along with Doritos #AllChipsMatter snack stations
エキサイティング!
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“NON-THREATENING LADY IN HEADSCARF”
Now if it was, "NOT A RADICAL ISLAMIC TERRORIST WE CHECKED" then we could talk, am I right? ;) (When in doubt, pander, yeah?)
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#AllChipsMatter
Definitely fills in the blank of mattering http://politichicks.com/2015/09/the-fill-in-the-blank-lives-matter-divide/
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ArrestingFacts
"Okay, okay guys, here me out: "ArrestingFacts." This is a great, catchy way to spin off of the 'AlternativeFacts' thing all the kids are talking about. And we're Pepsi. If anyone knows what the people want, it's US."
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The Resistance will be brought to you by PepsiCo
Bubble-syrup makers have authority to declare/resist war? I have storm-realize how importance-have bubble-syrup is to goaafy-Human. Bizarre culture... I am try-hard to have full-understand, but I am full-confuse, fail-soak.
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“Sorry about your ancestors!”
Note to self: add a "(not sorry)" here to show we're on that idfc trend on fleek~
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fun, freewheeling, well-styled protest to the other
Nice wording! Really captures that bar-crawl aesthetic young and old blood just seem to adore~
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Pure Premium Orange Juice
Ripe with the sharp tang of apathy year round~
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opportunistic
Again, guys, we got to mind those Ps and Qs~ The young blood has grown wise to the subtleties of misdirection and appropriation. Gotta get some new tricks~
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So Instagram yourself in one of our headscarf cutouts with the hashtag #ThirstIsTheRealTerrorist or in one of our branded Tostitos® cutouts with the hashtag #YouCantBuildAWallAroundFlavor.
Goaafy insult humor? Very emotion-bite.
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headscarf
Headscarf is bad or good for goaafy? Why head-clothing has attention? Audience is fear-have that actress is too warm, sweat-have during video-advertise? Is occupational hazard from costume-wear? I am more not-understand...
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fun, freewheeling, well-styled protest
I think I have wrong-translate... Any alchemist who is Chimera-language-know, is "protest" full-same to "frrinsrantir"? I thought yes... but seems not-right. I have much confuse...
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attractive protesters ages 12-24
What an amazing target age! This will really get people going. Exactly what we need
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Welcome all attractive protesters ages 12-24 with a secondary target of those 25-44 year old heads of household with an annual income above $55K!
Why open-greet only protesters who are youth-have, money-have, or beauty-have? Are these the importants and power-have among goaafy? Why do power-haves need protest?
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opportunistically
A tad too on the nose, unfair guys. Confer with your lawyer-men 'bout those words choices. Never name the game~
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Girls Just Wanna Have Fundamental Refreshment!
Can we also remediate Cyndi Lauper? Or she is a Coke person? Check the legal files ... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIb6AZdTr-A
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The Resistance is not trademarkable
I guess our lawyers work fast! See query from above!
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Millennial Stereotypes ’n Diversity Bingo™ online game!
Please make sure our tech head crew has the Augmented Reality app ready to go ... This test did not even feature Pepsi. Can we intimidate our tech heads? Or do we risk a hack? Damn. Times have changed.
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we said, “Martin, look, let’s keep it subtle.”
This is why we get paid the millions in yearly bonus and why Martin is now running to get us coffee somewhere in the midwest.
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a phallic T-shirt gun into the protesting crowd.
This visual should play well in the social media world
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INEEDALAY
We have heard from our children that this text message may be a possible double entrende. Please ask our lawyers to investigate that that means. Double Entrende? Sounds too Frenchy to us.
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our online event map
The map ...
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Tropicana® Orange You Glad Slavery Was Abolished Pavilion
A clever subtle reference to Anita Bryant?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ld8DQkC6po
Nice work McSweeny
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May we all have the bravery to one day flick off our expensive custom made blonde wig and walk away from our highly paid photo shoot
This bit was the pivotal turn in the video, maybe that opening sequence a tad long, but gave it a lot of time to build to the moment, when everything busted open. Yes, it took 12 takes to get it perfect, but so worth it. A throwback to classic movies
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it looks like an elementary school play about the ’60s?
A strong opening that only faintly ties back to the so wholesome Coca Cola commercial with the 60s reference (though it was 1971, looking back it looks like the 1960s, e.g. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sxHqWUnp2e4
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rorrim.arganee.world rorrim.arganee.world
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Oh, and that Dycpgc-Egpj-uyllyzc was going on about some other such nonsense here. Methinks she believes she’s clever. Ha. Perhaps, insightful, even . Haha. Again, you be the judge ^.^
Nmr, wms pcyjjw lccb rm kccr rfyr icrrjc~
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helterskelliter.wordpress.com helterskelliter.wordpress.com
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Nílim
Nach bhfuil tú ag baint úsáide as an frása i gceart~
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pesky faerie
Yeygl ugrf rfc lykc-ayjjgle, Dycpc-Egpj-uyllyzc~
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helterskelliter.wordpress.com helterskelliter.wordpress.com
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taunting
rfc rcjj gq rfc ryslr, dycpgc-egpj-uyllyzc
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eye
Qm ufw lmr pcnspnmqc rfc "yaacqqmpgcq" glrm yarsyj mlcq jgic zmuq? Kcrfgliq rfcw'b yr jcyqr zc md sqc rfcl... Qglac wms'pc yjj ynnypclrjw kmpc zjglb rfyl kwqcjd ^.^
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Which is which?
Umsjbl'r wms jgic rm ilmu :N
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rorrim.arganee.world rorrim.arganee.world
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pontification
Wms'pc mlc rm ryji yzmsr nmlrgdgayrgml, Qfybmu-Egpj-uyllyzc~
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